Fix Me
by xhidden.tearsx
Summary: 4 years ago she left Tree Hill with a broken heart and now a violent attack has brought her back to the place where her heart still lies.Brooke's return to Tree Hill raises questions and brings back buried feelings.BL/NH/PJ/BL.Better than it sounds!
1. The World Spins Madly On

_****_

Title: Fix Me

_**Pairings: BL, Julian/Peyton, NH, Minor BJ. (Let me know if there are any others you might like to see in a review or PM and I'll consider working them into the story).**_

_**Plot: After being viciously attacked in her own store, Brooke Davis is left in an extremely dark and broken state. She returns home to Tree Hill in search of healing herself and coming to terms with the fact that she believes her very own mother is the one responsible for the attack. In Tree Hill, she realizes how badly everything fell apart without her and learns the impact that her absence had on certain individuals. With the help of her friends, she slowly starts to uncover the pieces of her attack and learns the real truth behind it. Lucas is regretting his choices in life and the loss of inspiration has prevented him from writing a sequel to his best-selling novel but will the reappearance of Brooke Davis be the missing piece in making his life complete? Will they both be able to fix each other?**_

_**THINGS TO KNOW:**_

_**Naley are divorced (the story will also slightly focus on them fixing their marriage. It will also show how their marriage fell apart and the impact that Brooke leaving had on their marriage. YES, JAMIE IS IN THE STORY and they will cope with sharing custody of him. **_

_**Peyton lives in LA but she will be in the story (when she learns of Brooke's reappearance in Tree Hill, she comes home).**_

_**Julian and Brooke dated in New York a few years ago and there will be lots of history about their relationship (basically its' reversed from the show. Julian came to Tree Hill for Brooke but unexpectedly falls in love with Peyton instead.)**_

_**Victoria is behind the attack but there is more to the story than Brooke believes. (This plot will be developed later in the story).**_

_**Lucas and Peyton never dated after Brucas broke up senior year. An unkindness of Ravens was written about Brooke NOT Peyton. **_

_**Brooke was attacked at her store in New York, not Tree Hill. She left Tree Hill 4 years ago without any notice and hasn't spoken a single word to anyone from Tree Hill. It was her way of mending her broken heart. **_

_**QUICK NOTE: This story was one I started writing about the core 5 about a month ago called "It's Been Awhile". While I was writing the second chapter of the story I realized that I had a deeper connection with the Brucas dynamic of the story and therefore changed it. To fit with this story I changed some of the other characters plotlines. Naley being divorce rather than on the brink of divorce and Peyton not being a crack head but rather just depressed are some changes. You may also notice that I took a few scenes from the other story and used them in this one. That's because I didn't want to completely lose sight of the other story. I wanted some things to remain the same. Anyways, please read and I hope you all enjoy! **_

_**

* * *

**_

_**I let the day go by  
I always say goodbye  
I watch the stars from my window sill  
The whole world is moving and I'm standing still**_

_**xxxx**_

A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she stared out the window into the black night, a blanket of bright stars dancing along the sky. She remembered a time when those stars represented hope. When she was feeling lost or alone, she'd look out her office window, see those stars and they'd give her a sense of hope, a reassurance that everything was going to be okay. Now that hope seemed to be completely gone because as she looked out at those stars dancing along the brilliant New York skyline she felt nothing. Her seemingly perfect life was shattering around her as the reality of a cold and harsh world sunk in and the realization that sometimes the people you want so desperately to love you are the most heartless of all hit her. The sound of cars whizzing by, honking their horns every so often and the sound of heels clicking against the sidewalk filled the silence that had washed over her office. She loved New York but sometimes it was too much. Women desperately crowded the streets at night, wearing the fanciest clothes they could find, anticipating the night's events. She used to be one of those girls, until work overtook her life that is. And now everything she'd spent the last 4 years building up had disappeared in a single violent and tragic moment that would forever change her life as she headed down a dark and destructive path.

"Brooke…"

The brunette looked up from her desk as the soft voice filled her eerily quiet office. The voice belonged to Millicent Huxtable, one of her best friends. She'd hired Millicent as her assistant when she was fresh out of High School with no experience. There were several experienced applicants for the job but something about Millicent spoke to her. Millicent understood her and she didn't judge her. Over the last four years, they'd become the best of friends and Millicent was there for her when she needed her the most.

"Yes?" Brooke finally asked with a straight voice, her eyes still casting a glance out the window and into the darkness.

"This isn't you Brooke," Millicent whispered as worry brewed in her dark brown eyes. The cheery brunette that had hired her five years ago was gone, lost in a world surrounded by obscurity and hate. There was no emotion in her dull eyes as she spoke. Usually those beautiful almond shaped hazel eyes flickered with brilliance and compassion as a dimpled smile stretched across her face. "I want the old Brooke back."

"The old Brooke is gone," the fashionista deadpanned, the emotion completely drained from her usually raspy and upbeat voice. She was dead inside.

Millicent drew in a sharp breath as her fingertips nervously tapped the shiny desktop. "Don't let her win Brooke. Don't let her ruin your life or take your dream away. This is your company and you built it not her. This is your life, not hers."

Brooke shook her head, long brunette tresses falling into her face, and said the words that she dreaded to say. "She can have the company. All of it. If it really means that much to her, she can take it."

"Don't let her win Brooke," Millicent repeated, gripping onto Brooke's shoulder as a sign of moral support. "We can take her to court and fight it…"

Brooke held up her hand, revealing a set of perfectly manicured fingernails. "No Millie. We don't have the evidence and we can't prove it. She denies it and we have no logical evidence to convince the legal system otherwise."

"I promised you that we were going to make her pay for what she did and we will. I will hire you a team of the top detectives and lawyers in this city and get them to dig deep, find any little shred of evidence that can destroy her."

"No," Brooke shook her head furiously. "I don't want to hire a team of legal executives. I want out."

"But Brooke…" Millicent protested. Victoria was at fault here and she would pay for her heartless actions. Justice would be served and that merciless pathetic excuse of a mother would find herself behind bars. She was sure of it.

"Book me an appointment to see her," Brooke said stiffly as she started grabbing things from her desk and throwing them into a box. It really was sad that she had to book an appointment to talk to her own mother.

"If that's what you want," Millicent finally surrendered, an uneasy expression crawling across her face. Brooke was strong, she couldn't give up that easily. "But I could always run the company until you get back on your feet…"

"I said drop it Millie," Brooke interjected with a tone that was much harsher than she'd intended. She picked a stack of papers up off of her desk. "These," she waved the papers in Millicent's face, "are the rights to the company. I'm going to drop by her office first thing tomorrow morning and sign them over. This chapter in my life is over."

She didn't even give Millicent any time to respond as she grabbed her coat and her purse, flicked the lights off and slammed the office door shut.

* * *

Lucas Scott stared at yet another blank page. The cursor button blinked, indicating that it wanted him to type but he couldn't find the right words. He'd type a few lines, then quickly shake his head and erase the words. How the hell could writing a follow up to his bestselling novel be so hard? The answer was simple. He lacked inspiration. All of the good things that had once remained constant in his life were now absent. Brooke was gone. His relationship with both his brother and best friend were falling apart as their marriage shattered around them. Peyton was right. People always leave. The sound of the phone ringing broke him from his little pity party and he nearly fell over in his chair. Lucas slammed his computer shut and unfolded his legs out from underneath himself as she searched for his phone, which was hiding somewhere on his cluttered desk.

"Hello," he grumbled tiredly into the phone as he finally picked it up. He hadn't had a real sleep in days. Lindsey had been hounding him to write and he felt so obligated to give her something. Anything. He owed her that much for everything that she had given him.

"Lucas, please tell me that you're writing right now," Lindsey deadpanned on the other line, her voice edgy and her patience wearing thin.

"Yes," Lucas lied as he spun around in his chair. "I've been writing all day." At least he was telling some truth. He had been attempting to write all day.

"So how many chapters have you completed?"

Lucas grimaced at Lindsey's question. "Uh… can I skip that question?"

"Lucas…" Lindsey groaned. "Have you written anything at all?"

"No," Lucas admitted as he hung his head shamefully. "But that doesn't mean that I haven't been trying," he quickly added.

"Look Lucas," Lindsey stated firmly. "You're a great author and you have an amazing talent but you haven't been producing. I took a chance on you and I'm starting to lose my faith in you. I need something."

"I know Linds but I have no inspiration. My first story was inspired by real people, people that meant something to me. But those people are all gone now. I haven't seen 2 of the main characters since High School and I've become distanced from the other 2. How do you write a story when your inspiration is gone?"

"You find new inspiration," Lindsey smiled. "I know that it's tough and I'm going to give you a little while to get your life on track and start writing again but if this story isn't finished or at least almost finished by the end of the year then we may have to cut you from the company."

"I understand," Lucas replied solemnly with a quick nod of his head.

"Thanks Lucas and I will be continuously calling you to push you. I know it may get annoying at times but I'm just trying to help you."

"I appreciate that Linds."

"Shoot I have to go but keep writing Lucas. And please don't give up. It will come eventually, just have faith."

With that the line went dead.

Lucas rubbed his temple in frustration. How the hell was he supposed to find new inspiration? His only inspiration was gone and he wasn't sure if she was ever going to come back.

Lucas padded into the kitchen and opened the fridge. He grabbed himself a bottle of beer and stretched out on the couch. He flicked the TV on, turning it to his favorite channel. Sports Centre.

"I'm Marvin McFadden, coming to you live from Omaha…" Lucas groaned as he saw his former friend on TV. He was happy for Mouth but it was so hard watching the dreams of his friends come true when his didn't. He quickly flipped the channel, settling on a movie instead and reached for the phone to order a pizza. He hoped that Tim wasn't the delivery guy. That would just be another reminder of High School and the life that he left behind.

* * *

Sometimes she wonders if she'll ever be the same. Staring in the mirror, she sees a stranger. A remnant of the person she used to be. But she hasn't been the same. Not since the attack.

_**Flashback:**_

"_**This is my store, this is my life, it's what I wished for," Brooke sighed as she took one last look around her store. This store was her life. She had built her company in just 4 short years and became a multi-millionaire by the age of 22. She had worked so hard for everything and now Victoria was trying to take it away from her. She couldn't really believe that a company meant more to her mother than her own daughter did. The fashionista let out a defeated sigh as she turned around, flicked the lights off and pushed the door open. She didn't see it coming. Out of nowhere, a man came flying into her store, wearing black clothes with a ski mask pulled tightly over his face. She had little time to react but a shrill scream managed to escape her lips before he tackled her to the ground and beat her mercilessly. His knuckles thrashed against her cold skin and the horrifying sound of his fist connecting with her flesh echoed throughout the store. Her muffled screams were a mere cry for help, a mere cry for help that would never be answered. Battered and bruised, she laid almost lifeless in a heap on the stone cold floor inside her store, surrounded in a pool of her own blood. It was morning before anyone found her. **_

_**6 AM was way too early to be at the office, Millicent thought as she made her way towards the COB headquarters with 2 coffees in hand. Unfortunately, her boss was always the first one at the office in the morning so she was required to be there early. Millicent knocked on her boss's door to deliver her coffee but got an empty response. Strange, she thought. Brooke was always here by 6 AM. **_

"_**ALEXANDER!" she bellowed as the blonde man walked past her with a stack of papers. **_

"_**Yeah?" He turned and offered her a small smile.**_

"_**Have you seen Brooke?"**_

_**He shook his head. "I was the first one here this morning. Brooke isn't here."**_

_**Millicent quickly pulled out her cellphone and dialed number one on speed dial. It rang 5 times before voicemail picked up. "Hello, you've reached Brooke Davis…"**_

_**Millicent hung up the phone before the message could continue. "She's not answering her phone," she frowned at Alexander. "She's always here, what if something is wrong?"**_

_**Alexander shrugged, "Ask Victoria, I bet you she knows."**_

"_**Yeah right," Millicent scoffed. "Brooke and Victoria aren't on the best of terms in case you haven't noticed. Brooke fired Victoria."**_

"_**Yeah but she's still her mother she may know where she is. Why don't you try the store? I bet you Brooke's over there," Alexander offered with a shrug. **_

"_**Ooh, good idea. I will be back."**_

"_**Brooke!" Millicent's voice echoed throughout the store as she unlocked the door. In that moment, Millicent's eyes nearly popped out of her head. Clothes were strewn across the floor and it looked like the store had been hit by a tornado. "BROOKE!" she yelled frantically, her eyes scanning the store for her boss. **_

_**Then she spotted her. **_

_**Laying on the floor in a pile of crimson red blood, face badly bruised and beaten was Brooke Davis. "Oh my god," Millicent covered her mouth as she bent down and touched her friend. She did the first thing she could think of. Call 911. As she snapped her phone shut, she stroked Brooke's bloody cheek. "We're going to find out who did this to you and we're going to make them pay," she promised as tears started to roll down her cheeks. She couldn't imagine what kind of a person would do this. It had to have been a person so harsh, so cold-hearted, and so cruel. The only person that came to mind was Victoria. **_

_**END FLASHBACK**_

Slowly, she brought her hand to her cheek and softly stroked it, letting her fingers run along the bruises that decorated her face. She couldn't look at herself anymore. Disgusted, she lifted the oversized sunglasses from the top of her head and slid them over her eyes. She felt so worthless, so unloved, and so alone in a world that she was coming to hate. She went from having everything to nothing.

* * *

"Lucas Scott." The blonde turned around as he heard his name being echoed across the nearly empty bar. The tension-filled voice belonged to a man he struggled to recognize. His mind was working at a rapid pace as he tried to put a name to the anonymous face. Lucas guessed that they were probably about the same age and based upon the way he was dressed, Lucas would also guess that he was an important person.

"Yes?" Lucas finally asked, an undertone of annoyance clearly evident in his voice. "Do I know you?" He hadn't meant to sound rude but to most people the irritation plaguing his tone came across as impolite.

"No," his lips curled into a tight smile as she slid into the barstool beside Lucas. "But I know you."

Okay, creepy Lucas thought as he stared at the unknown man. "What do you want?" he asked with annoyance as he called Owen for another much needed drink.

He ran a hand through his unruly brown hair and a glint in his soft blue eyes told Lucas that he was here in Tree Hill for something important. "I have a business proposition for you."

Lucas raised an eyebrow at the mysterious man seated next to him. This was just getting stranger and stranger. "Look man, I don't even know you…"

"Julian Baker," he extended his hand out for Lucas to shake. "I'm a prominent movie producer."

"Good for you," Lucas smirked as he lifted his glass to his lips and let the alcohol seep into his system.

"I want to make a movie out of your book," Julian grinned as he glanced over at Lucas. The minute those words rolled off of his tongue, alcohol came flying across the countertop, earning a glare from Owen, the bartender.

"You've gotta be shitting me," Lucas mumbled with an exasperated tone. "I haven't even written a follow up to my best seller and you wanna make a movie out of a piece of shit book?"

"I can see that you have so much faith in yourself," Julian rolled his eyes, the sarcasm basically dripping off of his tongue with every word. "I read your book Lucas, it's really good and it has so much potential."

"Well if it had potential, I would've written a follow up," Lucas shrugged as she played with the straw in his drink. "I just can't understand why you'd wanna make a movie out of it, that's all."

Julian let out a deep and heavy sigh as he ran a hand over his temple. "I don't care if you haven't written a follow up. You're book is good and people love it. If we can turn those brilliant words and that suspenseful and dramatic plot into a big screen hit, we can produce millions."

"And how do I know that you're even legit?" Lucas narrowed his eyes and gave Julian a skeptical frown.

"Just ask Brooke Davis, she'll tell you," Julian smirked as he pushed his barstool back and stood up to leave. "Here's my card. Feel free to call when you've decided that this is what you need to put your career back on track."

"Wait a second," Lucas said as he set the card down. "What do you know about Brooke Davis?"

Julian turned and gave Lucas a small wink. "More than you think. She's the reason I read the book and she's the reason I believe in it."

Then he was gone. What the hell was that supposed to mean anyway? The card that he currently held in his hand could be the key to his future. He could finally live out his dream.

* * *

_**Woke up and wished that I was dead  
With an aching in my head  
I lay motionless in bed  
The night is here and the day is gone  
And the world spins madly on**_

_**xxxx**_

_**It all just seems so fake. This idea that good things happen to good people, and there's magic in the world, and the meek and righteous will inherit. There are too many good people that suffer for something like that to be true. There are too many prayers that get unanswered. Every day we ignore how completely broken this world is. And we tell ourselves "it's all gonna be okay, you're gonna be okay," but it's not okay. And once you know that, there's no going back. There's no magic in the world. At least not today there isn't. -Haley James-Scott, One Tree Hill.**_

_**xxxx**_

"I'm leaving." Her voice was stone cold as the words rolled off of her tongue. "And I'm not going to look back."

"And where exactly are you going?"

"Where nobody finds me," she answered coldly as she slammed the stack of papers on her mother's desk. "These are for you."

The older Davis woman scanned the documents and looked up in surprise. "You're giving me the rights to your company even after you're convinced that I hired someone to attack you?"

"I'm done with this," the brunette responded impassively as she picked up a pen off the desk and quickly scribbled her signature on the blank line. "As of now the company is yours."

"Brooke I…"

The brunette held up her tiny hand. "I don't wanna hear it Victoria. If having this company means more to you than having a relationship with your daughter then so be it."

"Despite what you think, I love you Brooke and I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you," Victoria insisted, her eyes showing signs of compassion and sincerity. However, those emotions were fake and Brooke could see right through them.

"Go to hell," the brunette whispered harshly. "All I've ever wanted from this world was for you to love me. A mother is supposed to love their children unconditionally and clearly you have no concept of that whatsoever. Someday when I have children I will think back on all of the times you've deceived me and I will use them as incentive to never be the mother that you were."

"All the times I've deceived you Brooke?" Victoria bit back with anger. "I gave you the best possible life that you could've asked for. You had everything that you wanted and then some so don't come in here and tell me that I've given you a bad life."

Brooke rolled her eyes at the comment. "Seriously mom are you really that stupid? I wanted you to love me so much that I acted out because I wanted attention. I know that my past isn't exactly great but I did those things in hopes that maybe you'd ground me or punish me like a real mom. But guess what? You were never there and you never cared. As long as I was out of the way and I didn't affect your life or your precious reputation then I was free to do whatever the hell I wanted. But I didn't want that life. I wanted parents that loved me and wanted me around. I would take that life over being rich and having everything any day. You don't know what it felt like to come home to an empty house nearly every single day and feel so alone." By the time she'd finished screaming at her mother, Brooke's cheeks were a deep shade of red and her breath fell short.

"I thought you wanted that life Brooke. I'm so sorry I…" Victoria stuttered as she struggled to find the right words.

"Don't say it mom. Don't say you're sorry and don't say that you love me because you sure as hell don't. I've always been a burden to you and that's why I'm leaving. You want to run this company yourself than do it but just know that I'll be laughing my ass off when you fail," the brunette spoke ruthlessly, her angst-filled voice signifying years of suppressed anger, despair, and hate. As she turned to exit her mother's life she realized that she was finally free. She could live her life the way that she wanted to and not the way that Victoria wanted her to. "Oh and by the way don't come running back to me when you fall flat on your ass because I have absolutely no sympathy for you. Let's just call it karma for all the times you never believed in me."

Before the heartless woman before her could speak, the fashionista was gone, a faded figure through the doorway. And she planned on never coming back.

* * *

_**I thought of you and where you'd gone  
And the world spins madly on.**_

_**xxxx**_

And that was how she found herself standing at the terminal in the Tree Hill airport, clutching her suitcases. She was going home, to the only place that she'd ever really known. She was leaving her worthless and absolutely destroyed life in New York behind as she embarked on a journey to heal her broken heart. Her body was still in a fragile state from the painful and tragic beating she'd taken only a week ago and she was afraid of how people in Tree Hill would react. Would they see her differently? Would they finally see past her strong and supposedly invincible façade? Would they finally realize that the tough exterior and unbreakable walls surrounding her were all a lie as they crumbled? What would they say when they found out that it was her own venomous and volatile mother that had caused this mess? Would they accuse her of running away from her problems like she always did? After all her sudden disappearance had surely raised many questions as the ones that she left behind soon realized that she'd left the small town in hopes of mending her severed heart. And finally how would they treat her after leaving them all behind and not even picking up a telephone in the last five years to even say something as simple as hello? These were the questions that haunted her as she fastened the buttons on her coat and tightly pulled the fabric close to her body in attempt to shield out the cold September wind that was swirling amid the town of Tree Hill, North Carolina. As she stepped into the cab outside the airport she mentally noted how much the town had changed in just four short years. The trees showed a beautiful array of autumn colors and the streets were lined with people busily chatting away. It looked like Tree Hill had grown immensely since she'd abandoned it 4 years ago but that welcoming feeling still loomed over the small city. Even though Tree Hill could now be classified as a small city it still had that small town presence to it. A small smile graced her face as the cab travelled along the streets of Tree Hill. She was finally home.

"Where to m'am?" the cab driver asked, breaking the silence that had washed over them.

Brooke thought about it for a minute. Should she go to Lucas's? She had no clue where Nathan and Haley lived or if they even lived in Tree Hill aymore. Maybe she'd just settle on a hotel. "The rivercourt please," she finally spoke, as the cab driver nodded his head and offered her a polite smile.

"And here we are," he smiled as they pulled up in front of the basketball court she'd once spent much of her teenage years at.

"Thank you," she nodded her head curtly and handed the driver a wad of cash. "Keep the change."

She stepped out of the cab, the nippy September weather causing a shiver to run down her spine, and took in a deep breath.

* * *

For hours, she just sat on the bench at the rivercourt and stared into space, trying to remember everything that she could about Tree Hill. Being at the rivercourt brought back a collection of memories, both good and bad. The writing on the surface of the court was the biggest reminder of all. 10 names were still splattered across the coarse blacktop in a variety of different colors, each depicting a different message. A tear slipped from Brooke's eye as she ran her finger along the name Lucas Scott. Most of the recollected memories were of him, both good and bad. They'd all promised that in 4 years time they'd return and now here she was. It was like fate had brought her back to this place. Or maybe she just wasn't ready to let it go quite yet. She felt a drop and looked up at the blackened sky. The clouds were moving in quickly and it was clear that a storm was rolling in. The rain started off slowly but gradually the drops became thicker and faster, falling at a brash speed. Brooke pulled the hood of her coat up to cover her brunette tresses and quickly glanced at her cellphone. It was almost 11 o'clock. She'd spent nearly 4 hours reminiscing at the rivercourt and now the rain was pelting down impetuously. If her memory served her well, she wasn't very far from Lucas's old house. He'd been so attached to that house and Karen had planned on skipping town after Lily's birth so chances are he still resided there. She figured Nathan and Haley would be the safer bet but she had no clue where to look for them and the sound of thunder roaring in the distance and the image of lightning cracking in the sky gave her little time think. She hated thunder and lightning storms and Lucas's house was very close. All she had to do was turn the corner, walk down the street and she'd be standing on his doorstep.

* * *

The sound of the doorbell ringing jolted Lucas Scott up from his desk. The clock on his computer indicated that it was 11 o'clock. Who the hell would be knocking on his door this late at night? It was probably just Nathan with more Haley issues or vice versa. He quickly shut his laptop and threw on a white t-shirt before making his way to the door. Nonchalantly, he threw the door open just as a bolt of lightning split through the sky, illuminating his front porch. His eyeballs nearly exploded out of their sockets and his jaw nearly dropped to the floor at the sight before him. Even with a pair of sunglasses on, which was unusual in the dark, he could recognize her.

"Brooke…" he whispered as she moved her dripping wet body closer to his. His eyes locked with hers for a second and then she slowly lifted the sunglasses from her eyes. "Hello, Lucas."

The sight before him was even more shocking than her arrival. He gasped as he saw her face. It was decorated in an array of large yellowish and purplish bruises and she looked tired. Her eyes were sunken and clearly sleep had not been her top priority in days. The usually radiant and cheerful Brooke Davis was not the one standing on his porch. Her hazel eyes were dark and emotionless, the beautiful dimpled smile that usually graced her face was gone and her lips were pulled into a tight line, indicating neither a frown nor a smile and her face was even more paler than usually. She looked dead.

"Oh. My. God," he whispered as he brought his hand to his mouth and covered it. She seemed so weak, so broken, so lost and he hated it. "What happened to you?"

"Life happened," she chuckled bitterly and the iciness of her tone literally scared him. He'd never heard her talk like that before.

He pulled her inside the house, the warmth engulfing both of their bodies, and tightly shut the door behind them. His gaze met hers for a second and then he pulled her in for a hug. At first she flinched at the contact and seemed rather hesitant but after a moment her body relaxed at his touch and she clung to him tightly, never wanting to let go. He could feel her hot tears soaking his dry t-shirt as she bawled her eyes out.

"Lucas?" she whispered into his shirt, her voice barely audible and her bottom lip quivering with nervousness, a habit she'd possessed since she was a small child.

"Yes."

"Fix me, I'm so broken," she whispered again, her raspy voice cracking with tears as she spoke and her body shaking violently with every sob that escaped her perfect lips.

It took everything inside of Lucas not to cry himself. He just nodded his head and continued to hold the brunette close to him as he stroked her hair and caressed her cheek ever so lightly, not wanting to hurt her. He pulled away and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. "Come with me pretty girl and you can tell me what really happened," he whispered as she grabbed her hand and led her into the kitchen.

* * *

_**AN: I had initially started writing this story as one surrounding the core 5 but as I was writing I decided that it would just be easier to use primarily Brucas and just add the other characters in on the side. NH and Julian/Peyton will be the other pairings with mentions of BJ. I also changed the title because I thought that this was much more fitting and the dynamics of the story will be slightly altered from the other one I'd written (Peyton's not a crack head and Naley are divorced instead of on the brink of divorce). I am going to warn you that this story will be very dark at times but eventually the mood will lighten up as Brooke learns to cope with her attack. Next chapter will introduce the other characters and have more and more Brucas. The song used was "World Spins Madly On" by The Weepies just in case anyone was wondering. Please review and let me know if this story is worth continuing. Also, TWWW readers, I feel like such a horrible person for not updating sooner but I have most of the next chapter written and will hopefully get it up this week sometime!**_


	2. Shadows & Regrets

_**I'm back, back in town  
and everything has changed  
I feel, feel let down  
The faces stay the same  
I see, see shadows  
Of who we used to be  
When I drive, drive so slow  
Through this memory**_

_**xxxx**_

"You show up on my door step at eleven o'clock at night in the pouring rain after disappearing four years ago, with your face badly bruised and you expect me to believe that you're okay?" Lucas raised an eyebrow as he stared at the timid brunette before him. This version of Brooke scared him. In all the years he'd known Brooke Davis, he'd never seen her as shy or nervous. She was always outgoing and blunt and she always spoke her mind even if whatever was on her mind was rather inappropriate.

"I'm not okay," she whispered quietly as she shook her head, chocolate brown locks falling into her face.

"Well then why don't you tell me why you're not okay? Not saying anything makes people assume that you're okay, when clearly you are not."

"It's complicated," she shrugged. Lucas noticed that she avoided eye contact with him whenever she spoke. It was like she was afraid of him and that scared him more than anything.

"You can't show up on my doorstep after 4 years of silence and tell me that's it complicated Brooke. Who did this to you?" Lucas demanded, a fire lighting in his passionate blue eyes as he spoke.

"What makes you think that somebody did this to me? Maybe I did this to myself?" she suggested with a straight voice. She was a good liar, she'd always been but Lucas Scott was one of the few people that could see right through her lies.

"You didn't do this to yourself," he chuckled bitterly. "The handprints on your arm indicate that someone physically abused you. Please just let me in Brooke. Maybe I can help."

Self-consciously, Brooke slid her jacket over her body in attempt to shield the bruises that decorated her arms. "I was attacked," she mumbled as she drew in a sharp breath. "About a week ago."

"By who," Lucas croaked as images flashed in his mind of all the possibilities that could've happened.

"My very own mother," she said flatly, no emotion in her voice at all.

"Your mom did this to you?" he whispered quietly as he ran a hand along Brooke's banged up cheek ever so lightly.

Brooke shook her head. "No but she hired someone to do it for her. I have this theory that I was just disposable in her little plan to achieve fame. She saw my talent and she used me to build this extravagant and wealthy company then as soon as she had everything she wanted she decided that it was time to get rid of me. I was only a distraction and that's all I've ever been."

Lucas slammed his fist down onto the table harshly, causing Brooke to jump a little. "That bitch!"

"We are going to make her pay for her actions," Lucas whispered as calmly as he could muster but inside he felt a war begin to wage.

"No," Brooke shook her head confidently. "I'm done with her and I could care less if I ever see or speak to her again. She is dead to me."

"You can't let her get away with this Brooke," Lucas insisted, harshness plaguing his voice insistently. "I won't let her be responsible for breaking you."

"I was broken long before she attacked me," Brooke admitted as she let out a deep sigh. "This just made me realize that I have nothing left to live for."

"Nothing left to live for?" Lucas blinked with confusion. How could she believe that she had nothing left to live for? "Brooke you have everything left to live for. You need to prove to Victoria that she cannot take your passion or your talent away no matter how hard she tries. She may have taken the company but she didn't take your talent Brooke."

"I am nothing without that company Lucas and I have nothing!" Brooke screamed heatedly as she released every bottled up emotion inside of her, the emotions that she'd been hiding behind her strong façade ever since the attack. "That company was my life and it was what I lived my life for. It is what I strived to become and everything that I could've hoped for and she tore it down. Now I have nothing left." Her breakdown was followed by a multitude of tears, flowing freely down her soft cheeks.

"Brooke," Lucas whispered serenely, in attempt to buffer the situation that was playing out before him. "What about the people you left behind in Tree Hill? These are the people that love you, isn't it worth living your life for them?"

"I don't know anyone anymore Lucas. I'm not the same girl that I was 4 years ago. That girl is gone Lucas and I don't think she's coming back."

"Come here," Lucas smiled lightly as he placed his arms around the broken brunette. "I'm going to show you the amazing impact that you've had on everyone and I'm going to prove to you that carrying on is the answer."

Brooke just nodded her head as she clung to Lucas tightly, closing her eyes and taking everything in. "Can I stay here for awhile?" she finally mustered up the courage to ask the question that had been haunting her since she showed up on his doorstep a mere hour ago.

"Of course you can. It's good to have you back Brooke Davis," Lucas grinned as he released the brunette. And he meant every word. He was going to finally do the one thing that he had failed to do so many years ago. He was going to save her.

* * *

**_When we were only kids_**  
**_And we were best of friends_**  
**_And we hoped for the best_**  
**_And let go of the rest_**

**_I heard, heard myself_**  
**_Say things I'd take back_**  
**_If I could, could retell_**  
**_And make these stories last_**  
**_I see, see shadows_**  
**_Of who we'll always be_**  
**_And I drive, drive these roads_**  
**_That made our memories_**

**_xxxx_**

"Hey."

Her voice was stone cold, possessing no sign of emotion or life. She sounded empty. Just like her marriage. Or rather, ex-marriage.

"Haley," he whispered and the desperation is reflected in his tone. It's pathetic really.

"Nathan," she nodded her head curtly. "Where is…"

"MOM!" a little voice boomed and she looks up to see her 4 year old son running at her full tilt, his messy blonde hair flying behind him.

"Jimmy-Jam," she grinned as she scooped the little boy up in her arms. "How was your weekend with your dad?"

"It was fun! We went to the bobcats game and he got my jersey signed by some of the players!" the little boy gushed excitedly, his blue eyes filling with laughter and passion. She wished that she could feel as alive and as energetic as her son but considering the circumstances she wasn't sure if she'd ever feel that way again.

"Well, we'd better get going babe," Haley sighed as she set her son back down on the ground gently and offered Nathan a small but yet forced smile. "Say goodbye to your father."

"Bye daddy," the little boy whispered as Nathan wrapped his large arms around the boy's small frame.

"Goodbye Jamie," he whispered quietly. Goodbye was always the hardest part and every time his wife and son departed, goodbye only grew harder to say.

"We will see you next weekend," Haley stated plainly before turning on her heel, her sons hand tightly interlocked with her own, and heading towards her car.

* * *

"Here you go," Haley smiled as she handed her son a plate of macaroni and cheese. "I made your favorite."

"Thanks momma," the boy smiled gratefully as he dug his fork into his plate and began shoveling food into his mouth.

"Where are your manners young man?" Haley raised her eyebrows and shot her son a questioning look. "I know that your father allows you to eat like a caveman but I don't condone those kinds of table manners."

"Right," Jamie smiled innocently as he took a much smaller bite of food and chewed with his mouth closed.

_**RING RING **_

"Ugh," Haley groaned as the phone rang. She rubbed her temple tiredly before glancing at the caller ID and debating on whether or not to answer. _**LUCAS SCOTT**_ flashed across the screen and her brow furrowed in confusion. She hadn't spoken to Lucas in probably two weeks or so and she found it odd that he'd be calling, especially when he knew that she ate lunch promptly at 12 o'clock every day. He usually wouldn't call until after he knew that she wasn't eating.

"Hello," she smiled into the phone as she juggled the receiver in between the crook of her neck with her shoulder and cheek.

"Haley. I need you to come over here right now." Haley didn't miss the prominence in Lucas's voice or the urgency of his tone.

"Well… I just picked up Jamie from Nathan's and I was going to grade some papers… can't it wait?"

"No, Haley. Please just come," Lucas begged and Haley felt bad because she hadn't spoken to Lucas in weeks and it was mostly her fault because she'd been busy.

"Fine," she surrendered as she looked over and noticed that Jamie was already finished eating. "I will call Nathan and see if he can watch Jamie for awhile."

"Thank you."

"No problem," she answered flatly before hanging up the phone. She couldn't help but wonder what was going on over at Lucas's.

She quickly dialed the familiar number and listened to the ringing sound on the other end. She was ready to give up when finally she heard his phone click on. "Yeah?"

"Nathan, are you busy right now?"

"Depends," he chuckled lightly but of course he wasn't busy. His days were filled with silence and dullness.

"Lucas is having an emergency of some sort and he needs me like ASAP so can you please watch Jamie while I go to his house?"

"Sure," Nathan agreed as he twirled the telephone cord around his finger absentmindedly. "You know that I love spending time with Jamie whenever I can."

"We will be there in 5," Haley said plainly before hanging up and gathering her keys and purse from the counter. "Come on Jimmy-Jam, you're going back to dad's house."

The four year scrunched his face up in perplexity. He knew the routine and he'd just left his dad's house so why he was returning was a mystery to him. "But I was just there…"

"I know but Uncle Lucas needs me and I figured that while I was visiting Uncle Lucas, you could spend more time with your father," Haley suggested with a shrug as she slipped her flats on and grabbed Jamie's shoes for him.

"Okay!" the little boy clapped his hands together excitedly. "I never get sick of playing video games."

Haley rolled her eyes as she ushered her son out the door and locked it behind them. She watched as her son bounced towards the car and she felt a deep frown spread across her face. It shouldn't be like this. She shouldn't be driving to Nathan's every weekend to drop her son off, they should be a family. She quickly shook it off. This isn't your fault, she reminded herself as she walked towards her car. It wasn't her fault that her marriage was over. She wasn't the one that chose alcohol as an escape route for her pain.

* * *

**_Everything has changed_**  
**_Faces stay the same_**  
**_Everything has changed_**  
**_Faces stay the same_**

**_xxxx_**

10 minutes later, her sleek black car was pulling up outside of Lucas Scott's residence. A deep sigh escaped her lips as she locked the doors and jogged up the front steps. She didn't even bother knocking, she just threw the door open and slipped her shoes off.

"Hello?" her voice drifted throughout the house and she heard hushed voices coming from the kitchen. What the hell…

"Hey Luke," she offered the blonde a smile as she entered the kitchen. "Brooke," she nodded her head towards the brunette and turned back to Lucas. "So what did you… wait a second BROOKE?" her eyes nearly came out of their sockets as her eyes refocused on the brunette that had left them 4 years ago.

"Hey," she chuckled nervously as Haley rushed over and wrapped her arms around the woman that she had considered one of her very best friends, despite the lack of contact over the last 4 years.

"Brooke, take the sunglasses off," Lucas warned, his voice edgy and Haley could sense some obvious tension.

"Fine…" the brunette breathed out and Haley smiled as she could picture Brooke rolling her eyes underneath the oversized glasses. She lifted her hands and slid the glasses off of her eyes and up on top of her head.

A large array of purple and yellow bruises adorned her usually unblemished and perfect face, followed by some slight swelling above her left eye, and a small but yet unmistakably deep cut coated the swelling.

"Brooke…"

"I was attacked," the brunette spoke ruthlessly, the hate and disparity clearly evident in her voice. "By my own mother."

"Oh, honey," Haley mumbled as she looked at Lucas helplessly and wrapped her arms around the brunette's petite frame. "Why didn't you come to us sooner?"

"I didn't want to burden you guys with my problems…"

"We would've helped you Brooke. There is no way that your mom attacking you is a burden to us Brooke," Haley whispered comfortingly. "God, how could she do this to you?" A tear started to slip from her soft brown eyes and she found herself reaching up to wipe the sultry liquid away.

"She cares about no one but herself and I needed to get away from New York because I was afraid of ending up like her," Brooke spoke quietly as her voice burned with anger.

"Brooke, you will never end up like her!" Lucas snapped, his voice sounding harsher than he'd intended.

"That's what I thought but I've already become her. I'm miserable, alone, and self-destructive."

The hopelessness in her voice made both Haley and Lucas exchange looks of concern. "Brooke…" Haley spoke as she struggled to find the right words.

"I just want to be alone for a while okay?" the brunette insisted as she stood up and headed towards the door. "Please?"

Haley looked at Lucas who nodded. "But please don't go far."

"Just into the backyard," she replied solemnly before slipping out the door.

"Oh. My. God," Haley groaned as she covered her mouth with her hand. She was having a difficult time comprehending this whole situation. "When did she show up here?"

"Last night," Lucas shrugged. "She stayed in the guest room and we haven't spoken much since he arrived. She's just so distant and unlike herself."

"What about Victoria? Did Brooke turn her in?"

"No. She gave the rights to her company to Victoria and just left. She's scaring me Haley. She said that her life wasn't worth living anymore…"

A few tears started to slip from Haley's eyes yet again. "What happened to her? God, she was so full of life and happiness and now she's bitter and angry and mad at the world… I mean yes she has every right to be after what happened but it just scares me that's all."

"It scares me to Haley," Lucas whispered as she wrapped his best friend in a tight hug. "But we've got to do everything that we can to show her the importance of her life and the impact that it has had on others."

"Of course," Haley nodded her head in agreement. "But I don't think we should do it alone."

"How do you mean?" Lucas scrunched his brow in confusion. He knew that Nathan had been horribly upset with Brooke for leaving. He'd never forgiven her for causing his family so much pain. She'd left Jamie without a godmother and she never even bothered to call, visit, or send him a freaking birthday card. And she'd left a pregnant Haley behind, a pregnant Haley who'd been devastated by Brooke's disappearance.

"Peyton."

"Peyton?" he turned to look at Haley as if she were out of her freaking mind. "I haven't seen Peyton since High School…"

"But I've kept in contact with her," Haley responded as she reached for her phone and scrolled through the contact list. "It's not really good contact but we exchange cards on important holidays and we call one another every so often and I even visited her once in LA a few years back…"

"I guess I kept in contact with her because I was afraid of losing her like I'd lost Brooke…" Haley trailed on as she noticed the skeptical look that Lucas was giving her.

"And what makes you think that Peyton can help? She and Brooke haven't spoken to each other rationally since the break up…"

"Because even though she made some big mistakes in the past, she loves Brooke and she knows Brooke better than any of us."

"Nobody knows Brooke anymore," Lucas whispered sadly as he glanced out the window and saw Brooke sitting on the sand just behind the backyard, staring out at the ocean helplessly.

"Why don't you call Peyton while I talk to her?" Haley suggested as he gaze followed Lucas's out the window. "Please?"

He didn't want to talk to Peyton in the least bit but Haley was right, she did know Brooke better than anyone and she had a special bond with Brooke that neither of them had. "Alright," he surrendered as he grabbed Haley's phone. She sent him a small smile and before he knew it she was slipping out the backdoor too.

Peyton Sawyer. His hands trembled with nervousness as he stopped scrolling once he reached the number he was looking for. He wasn't nervous because he felt anything for Peyton. He was nervous because he hadn't spoken to her in over 4 years and he didn't know what to expect. What if she too was not the same Peyton he'd known in High School?

Finally, his shaky hands managed to press the call button and before he knew it the familiar sound of a phone ringing assaulted his eardrums.

"Hello?"

She still sounded the same. He could recall that Peyton had left Tree Hill 4 years ago to mend her broken heart as well. After being rejected by none other than himself and shunned by her best friend, it was clear that Peyton felt there was nothing left for her in Tree Hill and so she left for LA, the city that was full of opportunities and excitement. A job working as an intern for Sire Records had shown up and surprising enough after being one of the five final applicants, Peyton had gotten the job. And that was the beginning of her new life, the start of the life she lived today.

"Hey Peyton. It's me, Lucas," he spoke awkwardly, his eyes still casting a glance outside where Haley and Brooke were.

"Lucas? Wow, it's been a long time hasn't it?"

"Yeah, it's been four years. So how are you doing Peyt?"

"Fine," she answered flatly. "I mean it could be worse right?"

"So why did you call? Not to sound rude or anything but obviously there is a reason behind your random phone call after four years of silence…"

"Don't blame me for those four years of silence Peyton when you caused them just as much as I did," Lucas growled, annoyed. "I didn't call to fight. It's about Brooke…"

* * *

_**And we were only kids**_  
_**And we were best of friends**_  
_**And we hoped for the best**_  
_**And let go of the rest**_

_**Shadows and regrets**_  
_**We let go of the rest**_  
_**Shadows and Regrets**_  
_**We let go of the rest**_

**_xxxx_**

The brilliant blue waves rolled in, crashing hard against the sandy shore. The beach was deserted but where Lucas lived it usually was. The sky was a light shade of gray, plagued with slightly darkened clouds, which hid the sun. The setting before her depicted her mood perfectly. That emptiness, that stillness, that feeling that a storm was brewing in, they all represented her life at this point in time. The waves thrashed against the shore in perfect rhythm. With her feet curled up to her chest, she continued to stare, without emotion, at the dark and gloomy setting surrounding her. She felt like she was lost in an endless sea, full of tumultuous twists and turns, betrayals and lies, there was no way out. The world was broken and someone along the way in her fight to the top, she'd lost herself. The girl that had lived in this town four years ago, the girl that had once walked this very beach five years ago with a brilliant smile etched across her face, was gone. She become a shell of the person she'd least wanted to become. She was slowly becoming her mother and as her life derailed she wasn't sure that there was any way she could stop it. The genetics were too powerful.

"Hey stranger."

The brunette quickly snapped out of her nightmare and turned slowly, offering the brunette a weak smile.

"Can I sit?" Haley motioned towards the spot beside Brooke.

Brooke patted the sand beside her and nodded. "I don't wanna talk about it Haley."

"I wasn't going to ask. Lucas did enough explaining and when you're ready to give me all the details, I'll be here to listen."

"Thank you," Brooke nodded her head appreciatively. Haley was always so understanding and in every situation she looked for the best.

"I'm glad your back. I have to admit, I'd kinda lost my faith in you ever returning…"

"Did everyone really doubt me that much?" the fashionista asked as she turned towards the young mother.

"I'm sorry Brooke…"

"I'm sick of apologies," the brunette mumbled in response as she averted her eyes away from Haley and refocused them back on the tumbling ocean.

"So how are Nate and Jamie?" Brooke asked, succumbing to the overwhelming silence that loomed around them.

"Jamie is getting so big and he definitely got my smarts and his dad's love of basketball. He always asks about his Aunt Brooke and why he's never met her..." Haley quickly stopped when she saw Brooke's face fell at the last sentence. "Sorry, I shouldn't have…"

"No, it's okay," Brooke insisted. "Like I said, I'm sick of apologies," she threw the last part in bitterly.

"And Jamie adores his Uncle Lucas, he kind of looks like Luke, ironically enough and he loves mac and cheese like his mom," Haley laughed, her eyes crinkling with happiness for the first time in a long time.

"What about Nate? How is he?" Brooke asked as she picked at the loose seems from the fashionable rips in her designer jeans.

"I don't know. I don't talk to him much anymore, except for issues regarding Jamie," she shrugged poignantly. "Luke would probably be the one to answer that for you."

"What do you mean you don't talk to him anymore?" the brunette's hazel eyes flickered with curiousity and perplexity.

"Nathan and I are divorced. We have been for almost a year now," she answered sadly, looking down at her hands as she spoke, her gaze landed on her bare ring finger and she felt a tear slip from her eye. She quickly brushed it from her cheek and smiled.

"Oh, Haley, I'm so sorry," Brooke muttered apologetically and she instantly felt bad for lashing out at Haley when she was dealing with her own pain, pain that had been clearly masked and was starting to bubble at the surface. "I really thought you and Nate would've been together forever. As soon as she said those words, she mentally kicked herself for being so stupid. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean…"

"I know you didn't," Haley smiled lightly. "Sometimes love just isn't enough to last forever."

"Well, at least you've had a date in the last five years," Brooke grumbled sarcastically, followed by a bitter chuckle. "My love life has been non-existent since Lucas."

"You never let him go did you?" Haley questioned, her eyes trained on the vulnerable brunette that was basically ripping her heart out.

"Nope," Brooke shook her head. "God knows, I've tried but I can't…" she croaked through salty tears. "It's like he's burned in the back of my mind and I've tried to get over him and move on for both my sake and for his sake but I just can't bring myself to do it…"

"Well, Luke never got over you either."

Brooke turned to Haley and shook her head. "I didn't come here looking for love okay? I came here for redemption, I came here because life became too much and I did the one thing I do best, run away. And strangely enough, this is where my feet took me okay?"

"Fine," Haley put her hands up in the air in mock surrender. Looking at this version of Brooke, Haley understood that playing matchmaker would be the wrong thing to do. Brooke came first and making sure that Brooke was okay physically and mentally was her first priority. Finding love would just have to wait.

* * *

"What about Brooke?"

"She's here in Tree Hill."

"What?" Peyton screeched into the phone, causing Lucas to momentarily retract the device from his ear. "I thought she left Tree Hill for good. Haley said she hasn't seen or heard from Brooke since she left following graduation…"

"She did but now she's back Peyton and its bad, really bad…"

"Is she okay Lucas? What happened? Please tell me she's okay," Peyton started throwing questions at him in a rapid flow.

"She's not okay…"

"What do you mean she's not okay? Is she like physically hurt Luke?" Peyton demanded, her voice hardening at the mention of Brooke not being okay.

"Yes, but the emotional damage is a million times worse…" Lucas responded meekly. "This version of her is literally scary Peyton and I don't know what to do." He rubbed his face tiredly with his free hand as the words came flowing out.

"What happened?" the blonde demanded with a fierceness in her voice that told Lucas she was dead serious about this.

"She was attacked..." Lucas started, his voice croaking as he tried to retell the story that had been haunting him last night. "By Victoria."

Silence.

"She was what?" the blondes outburst was loud and firm, mixed with shock and disbelief.

"Attacked by her mother…"

"I'm not retarded Lucas but how? Why? I don't get it. It mean yes Victoria was a horrible mother but I don't understand how even she could do something that cruel to the most amazing person that has ever walked this earth…"

"I don't either Peyton but she is fragile right now and she needs my help and Haley's help but she also needs yours."

"I'm already on it Lucas," Peyton answered briskly as she began typing away on her laptop in search of the quickest flight to Tree Hill. "I can be there by 8 O'clock tomorrow morning."

"Okay, I'll be at the airport to pick you up Peyt and thank you so much for coming. It's gonna mean a lot to Brooke. But how long are you planning on staying?"

"Well considering I just quit my job at Sire a week ago and am currently unemployed, hopefully awhile," she answered as a smile spread across her face. "And thank you Luke for calling, it means so much to me."

"Not a problem Peyton, I'll see you tomorrow morning, eight o'clock and don't be afraid to call if there is a delay in your flight."

"I won't be. Goodbye Lucas," she whispered into the phone before hanging up and darting out of the room to pack her bags. She was going home to save her best friend. She'd hurt Brooke in the past and god knows she doesn't deserve another chance but she's praying to god that she'll get one because life without Brooke Davis has already become too unbearable.

* * *

AN: Sorry for the wait but life's a bitch and I've had very little time to update this. Hopefully, people will continue to read regardless and I have some good stuff in store for next chapter. I want to give a better glimpse at Naley's marriage. Perhaps some flashbacks about the demise of their marriage will be in store? Also Peyton will be arriving and Julian is gonna stir things up pretty soon. If anyone wants me to add Rachel into the story just let me know and also tell me who'd you'd like her to end up with. Mouth, Cooper (assuming he and Rachel reunited after their tragic almost-death), and Owen are a few suggestions. Please review, please they will hopefully speed up the updating process!


	3. It's Been Awhile

_It's been a while_  
_Since I could hold my head up high_  
_and it's been a while_  
_Since I first saw you_  
_It's been a while_  
_since i could stand on my own two feet again_  
_and it's been a while_  
_since i could call you_  
_But everything I can't remember as fucked up as it may seem_  
_the consequences that I've rendered_  
_I've stretched myself beyond my means_

**xxxx**

The neon numbers blinked 2:13 AM when Lucas Scott was jolted awake by the agonizing screams. He quickly threw the blankets off his body and swung his legs over the side of his bed before dashing into the bedroom across the hall. She was lying in a ball on the bed shaking and tears were running down her face like crazy, bleeding tracks of mascara. This was the first time that he had really saw Brooke Davis cry since she'd been in Tree Hill.

"Brooke? Are you okay? Did you have a nightmare?" Lucas asked frantically as he sat down on the edge of the bed and rubbed circles on her back.

Through her tears, she managed a small "yes." Lucas could see the pain in her eyes and he felt himself growing weaker inside. It was killing him to see a girl that was once so bubbly and full of energy and life this way.

"It's gonna be okay," he whispered sincerely, tiredness plaguing his voice. Her tears started to subside as he rubbed her back.

He stood up slowly but her meek words caused him to stop dead in his tracks. "Don't go." She sounded so helpless and he knew that he couldn't leave her there alone.

He managed a small smile before slipping under the covers and sliding in next to the brunette. He wrapped an arm around her waist as he pulled her closer to him. She clung to his body as she took in a deep breath and buried her head in the crook of his neck, engulfing in his scent.

"What was the nightmare about?" he asked briefly as he closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. "I mean if you don't feel comfortable with me asking it's okay I…"

"Flashbacks," she whispered quietly. "Of the attack and of my life in New York…"

xxxx

_**FLASHBACK:**_

_"Why in the hell are you so ungrateful. You have a life that any 22 year old would kill for. You are a multi-millionaire Brooke Davis and you wanna throw it all away for a boy?"_

_"Not just any boy mother. Lucas Scott," the brunette whispered sharply as she ran her fingers along a faded picture from her High School days. _

_Victoria grabbed the picture and ripped it in half. "High School is over Brooke. This is your life now and you chose to leave these people behind."_

_"I didn't choose to leave them behind mother! I left because I had my heart broken into a million pieces. I had no intentions of leaving them entirely. I just wanted to get my life on track but I never wanted to cut them from it…"_

_"Don't blame me Brooke," her mother laughed bitterly as she sent her daughter a menacing glare. "You chose this life and these are the consequences that come with fame and fortune."_

_"I miss Lucas and I miss my other friends. I want to go home," the brunette whispered as a wave of nostalgia hit her._

_"You are home," the older brunette seethed. "This is your home now and your company is your life. You don't have time to go play house with the ex-boyfriend that never wanted you in the first place. Hick Hill, North Carolina is your past and this," she motioned towards the elegant cit from the office window. "Is your future."_

_"I never wanted this," the brunette broke down as tears spilled from her hazel eyes. "You know sometimes I wish that I had been pregnant senior year. Because then you would have disowned me and wouldn't have to feel this pain. I could have been with the boy I loved and I could have lived a quiet life in Tree Hill."_

_"Do you hear yourself Brooke?" Victoria let out a disgusted laugh as she shook her head violently. "You would give up this life for a boy that doesn't even love you back? For a boy that put you on the back burner when your best friend all of a sudden decided that she wanted what was yours?"_

_"I was never second best mom," Brooke answered painfully as she looked at her hands. "Lucas rejected Peyton after I broke up with him. Luke and I were young when we dated and we weren't cut out for a relationship. I'm ready to be with him now and I know that the kind of love we had is too good to not take a chance on."_

_"Quit feeling so nostalgic Brooke. That boy never loved you, he just wanted to get in your pants like all the other boys Brooke," Victoria growled, her eyes forming into slits of anger. "He never loved you and he never will!"_

_"My whole life, you have made me feel like I was never enough, like I was always one step below you. Now that I am higher than you and I have everything that you one day dreamed of, you are trying to ruin my chance at happiness. Just because you never got your happy ending, why should anyone else right?" Brooke pointed out bitterly, the sarcasm dripping from her tongue with every word. _

_"I'm only doing what is best for you dear," Victoria answered genuinely as she reached out to grab her daughter's hand. _

_Brooke quickly slapped it away. Victoria Davis was anything but sincere and she could see the venom lurking behind the soft eyes that fronted her. Brooke knew this because she was the exact same way with her emotions. She hid behind her hard exterior because she didn't want people to see her vulnerability. Her mother hid behind her 'I care about you and I only want what is best for you' façade because she didn't want people to see that she was truly an evil and manipulative bitch. "You don't know what is best for me mother! You don't even know what is best for yourself!"_

_"I won't let you throw your life away for a boy that always puts you in second place. I know that feeling Brooke and I'd never inflict that upon anyone," her mother tried again, tears threatening to form in her eyes. Brooke had never seen her mother cry, not once in the 22 years she'd been on the planet. _

_"You don't want me to be happy because your marriage was a horribly failed lie?" Brooke asked as she turned towards her mother. "Is that it mom? Because guess what, not everyone is like you and Richard!"_

_"I know that you think I'm a horrible mother and maybe I haven't tried as hard as I should have…"_

_"That would be an understatement," Brooke mumbled under her breath. _

_"But I want you to understand something Brooke," Victoria continued as she flipped her hair over her shoulder. "Richard was never there for you. After the divorce you never talked to Richard once. He has always been absent in your life. I might not have been the best mother but I was always there. I didn't just leave you when the going got tough…"_

_"No," she shook her head, tears threatening to fall from her saddened hazel eyes. She quickly lifted a finger and brushed them away. She would not allow herself to cry in front of Victoria, because that would expose a weakness that was unacceptable. "But you cut me down to size. My entire life I was picked at by you for not being perfect. Do you know how that made me feel?"_

_"Brooke I…"_

_"I don't need you in my life," Brooke hissed coldly. "I never needed you mom. You were always holding me back and you never believed in me. You just saw my talent and you wanted it all to yourself. If I wasn't a talented fashion designer we both know that we would not be having this conversation right now. I loved you mother and you never reciprocated it! You never once told me that you loved me or that you were proud of me…"_

_"I'm trying now Brooke. I'm here for you and I believe in you and I am incredibly proud of you despite what you think!"_

_"Go," the brunette whispered meekly. _

_"Excuse me?"_

_"You hear me mother, just go!" Brooke shouted tiredly. "I'm sick of this and I want out. I no longer want to live my life according to your guidelines. I want to live MY life."_

_"What about the company Brooke? Don't throw it away," Victoria pleaded, her eyes showing signs of desperation._

_"I'm not throwing it away," the brunette whispered angrily as she shook her head coldly. "I'm throwing you away. I worked so hard to get here and this company is my life. A life that you aren't a part of. You're fired."_

_"Brooke, you can't do that!"_

_"Actually I can," Brooke smirked. "I have one hundred percent ownership of this company. Remember these?" She waved the ownership papers in front of her mother. "If my memory serves me well, you signed these while you were inebriated."_

_"Brooke…" Victoria pleaded as she attempted to snatch the papers from Brooke's hand. _

_"You're fired mother. I'm done with you and I'm done with this life."_

_"Think about this before you act…"_

_"It's a done deal mother. I wiped you off the board earlier this evening. You are no longer a member of this company. Let's just call it karma for all the times that you never believed in me and underestimated the power that I had."_

_"Brooke…"_

_"I want your things cleared out of the office by tomorrow. My mind is made up and there is nothing you can say or do to change it."_

_She sent her mother one last cold glare before turning on her heel and clicking the door shut as she exited her mother's life. _

_**The very next day she was attacked. **_

_**END FLASHBACK:**_

_**xxxx**_

"And that was the trigger that started my attack. I keep thinking that if I had just let my mother stay on the company board that I wouldn't be living this life right now," the brunette explained as she lifted her head from the comfortable position it was in and stared deeply into the blonde's eyes.

"Brooke," Lucas whispered gently as he cradled her face in his hands. "You were right. You never were second best."

"I know," she smiled limply. "And that is why I defended you."

"You were going to leave that prestigious life in New York behind to come back for me?" he finally asked after a moment of silence.

"I was," she nodded her head slowly. "But just so you know, I am in no shape to be romantically involved with anyone right now. I need to figure out some things about myself first before I can engage in another relationship…"

"I'll be waiting," Lucas smiled as he pulled her closer to him. "For now, you are just my old high school flame and a friend who needs me more than ever."

"Thank you," she nodded her head curtly. "You're such an amazing guy Luke. Tell me again how you're not taken?"

"Every girl I've ever tried to date feels inferior to you. They read the book and that's the end of it," he admitted honestly as he looked down at his hands.

"I'm sorry," she whispered sincerely before reaching up and brushing a strand of blonde hair from his face.

"It's okay," he gave her a lighthearted grin. "It's fate's way of telling me that we are meant to be together."

She leaned up and kissed his cheek ever so lightly. "I'm sorry for coming back here and confusing you."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," he admitted as he played with a loose strand of her brunette locks. "You'll always be my pretty girl no matter what." He leaned down and kissed her temple before wrapping his arms tighter around her. "So where do we stand then?"

"Friends?" she asked, looking up at him innocently. "Until I at least figure my emotions out and learn to cope with this attack. A life changing event like this makes me in no shape to be in a relationship."

"I know it doesn't Brooke," he smiled as he brushed a hand over her cheek. "Now let's try to grab some sleep. I'm not going anywhere so if you have any more nightmares, I'll be right here."

* * *

_It's been a while  
since I could say that I wasn't addicted and  
It's been a while  
Since I could say I love myself as well and  
It's been a while  
Since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do  
It's been a while  
But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you  
But everything I can't remember as fucked up as it may seem  
the consequences that I've rendered  
I've gone and fucked things up again_

_**xxxx**_

_**FLASHBACK TO ONE YEAR AGO:**_

_**People think that if you love somebody hard enough then everything is just going to work out. People are wrong. 50 years from now, I hope you got what you wanted Haley, but getting married to you was the worst mistake of my life. Here's a little advice, never get married. In the end, you'll only be miserable.**_

_Never in a million years did Nathan Scott actually believe that the words he'd said in one of the darkest moments of his life would come true. **Never get married. In the end, you'll only be miserable. **And he was miserable. It's not that he didn't love Haley because he did but he was dealing with too much right now. Just months ago he had everything. He had the life. He was the number one prospect for the Charlotte bobcats and the leading scorer of the Duke Blue Devils. Nothing had been the same since the accident, the accident that had ruined his life, the accident that had taken away his dream. "Just walk away man," his brother had insisted but Nathan being Nathan didn't listen. Nathan Scott never backed down from a fight. He should've listened to his brother because that fight cost him his career. Knowing he may never be able to walk without any trouble again was one of the hardest things for him to accept. Knowing he may never be able to play basketball again was the hardest thing for him to accept._

_Now where's that whiskey? Nathan walked over to the cupboard in attempt to find the hidden stash. It was hard to walk with crutches and he could only walk for short periods of time but he had to keep the faith that someday he'd be able to walk fine on his own again._

_After about 10 minutes of rummaging around in the cupboards, Nathan spotted the bottle of whiskey, hidden in the very back, behind everything else. Uncapping the lid, Nathan brought the 26 ounce bottle of pure hard liquor to his lips and chugged a good portion of the bottle. It burned his throat but he chose to ignore the feeling. He was numb. He stumbled, with the aid of his crutches towards the couch and flopped onto it. He turned on a sports channel and slowly his eyes started to close, his body started to shut down, and he started to drift off into a peaceful sleep._

* * *

_**It all just seems so fake. This idea that good things happen to good people, and there's magic in the world, and the meek and righteous will inherit. There are too many good people that suffer for something like that to be true. There are too many prayers that get unanswered. Every day we ignore how completely broken this world is. And we tell ourselves "it's all gonna be okay, you're gonna be okay," but it's not okay. And once you know that, there's no going back. There's no magic in the world. At least not today there isn't.**_

_Her body shook with every violent tremor as Haley spoke into the phone. She was gone. When Haley needed her the most, when everything was falling apart, she was gone. It was easy for Haley to talk to her even if she wasn't there. It made her feel better. Haley shut her phone and tossed it into her purse before grabbing the stack of papers off her desk. She flicked the light off and shut the door to her classroom. She was afraid of what she might come home to._

_**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**_

_"MOM!" a little voice squealed and the image of a four year old running at her full tilt brought a small smile to Haley's face._

_"Hey Jamie," she smiled as she scooped the little boy up into her arms. "How was school?"_

_"Good. I painted a picture of you and me and daddy," he smiled proudly as he showed her a picture of their family. "And Chester too!"_

_Haley smiled sadly as she ran her fingers over the picture. "It's beautiful."_

_"Thanks Lauren," Haley smiled up at Jamie's teacher. "Thank you so much for watching Jamie."_

_"You're welcome Haley. I know that things haven't been easy with Nathan…" the young blonde replied before putting her hand on Haley's shoulder. "I hope things get easier for you."_

_"Yeah me too," Haley nodded. "Come on Jamie, we should get going. Say goodbye to Miss Lauren."_

_"Goodbye Miss Lauren."_

_"Goodbye Jamie. Bye Haley," she waved at the mother-son duo._

_Haley sucked in a deep breath as she pulled open the door and prepared herself for the worst. "Where's dad?" Jamie questioned, his eyes scanning the house for his father._

_"I don't know Jamie. Why don't you go play with Chester? I need to talk to your dad but I'll call you when dinner is ready," Haley replied gravely as she spotted her husband's sleeping figure sprawled out on the couch._

_Jamie opened his mouth to protest but the look Haley gave him convinced him otherwise. "Okay, momma," he nodded before trudging up the stairs to his bedroom._

_Haley let out a heavy sigh as she dropped her keys into the basket on the kitchen table and tripped over an empty whiskey bottle. She picked it up and tossed it into the trash can before making her way into the living room. Nathan was sprawled out on the couch with a thin blanket barely covering his body. His crutches were on the floor beside the couch along with a few empty beer bottles, an empty pizza box and a few DVD cases. Haley picked up the DVD cases and set them on the table before tossing the bottles and garbage into the trash can._

_"Nathan," she whispered as she shook her sleeping husband._

_"Go away," he grumbled in response, turning on his side so that he was facing away from her._

_"Nathan," she tried again, receiving a swat in return._

_"Nathan Royal Scott, get your ass up right now!" Haley demanded sternly. She would've flipped him off the couch but considering the circumstances she decided against it._

_"What do you want Haley?" he grumbled as he rubbed his tired eyes. "I was sleeping in case you hadn't noticed."_

_"Nathan, it's 4 in the afternoon and all you've done today is eat, drink, and watch TV. I'm trying here but you seem to be making no effort. I know that it's hard for you but it's hard for me too. I lost my mother Nathan and do you think that's not hard on me? Because trust me it is. It's hurts like hell but I have to push through the pain because my family needs me. My son needs me. And he needs you too."_

_"You don't get it, do you? I used to be somebody, Haley, do you understand that? Do you understand what that means? I used to be Nathan Scott, and I was great and I should have walked away okay I know that and I didn't do it, and now I'm nothing. And I have nothing!" Nathan yelled with rage as he slammed his fist down on the table._

_"You have nothing? You have a beautiful son who is here. I am here! You've gotta figure out who you're gonna be in this, Nathan. Because this version of you does not work for us. I cannot keep living like this, okay? Do you understand what I'm saying? One more night like this, Nathan, and I promise, you will have nothing!" Haley didn't wait for a response before turning and leaving the room._

_She made her way up the stairs, stopping at her son's room before entering her own. Jamie seemed pretty engrossed in his TV show, thankfully. She just hoped that he hadn't heard the arguing downstairs. A small smile graced her face as she watched him. She just hoped that for his sake, Nathan got his shit together soon._

_Haley slipped her shoes off and sat down on her bed. Her eyes wandered until they reached the double picture frame beside the bed. One picture was of her and Nathan on their wedding day and the other was of her and Nathan when Jamie was born. She wished that she could go back in time to a time when everything was so much simpler. She wished that she could go back to a time when she wasn't constantly reminded of how incredibly broken the world was. Losing her mother was an extremely painful thing for her to endure but unlike Nathan she was better at hiding her pain. She pushed through the pain that life brought her in order to take care of her family. Eventually she would break and she would learn how cold the world really was. She couldn't hold on forever._

_**Two weeks later, Haley filed for divorce.**_

_**END FLASHBACK**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Why must I feel this way?_  
_Just make this go away_  
_Just one more peaceful day_

_And it's been awhile_  
_Since I could look at myself straight_  
_And it's been awhile_  
_Since I said I'm sorry_  
**xxxx**

She nervously played with her thumbs as she stared out the plane window. They were landing and soon she would be in Tree Hill, the town that she hadn't returned to since leaving 5 years ago. She hadn't been to Tree Hill since High School graduation and she was scared. She hadn't kept in contact with Nathan, Brooke, or Lucas over the years. She had kept in small contact with Haley and was aware of the divorce, although it was still a hard concept to swallow. It made no sense to her at all. She didn't know what to expect from anyone. Surely, they were not the same people. She had fucked things up majorly with Brooke. They had yet to resolve their falling out during senior year. She realized after months of pining for Lucas that they weren't meant to be because he would always love Brooke and that she would never measure up to Brooke. She left Tree Hill to ease the heart break and pain that she had left behind. They had come a long way in the past four years and she hoped that they could finally push things aside and work on Brooke's recovery together. All 4 of them.

* * *

"Peyton."

The blonde snapped around at the familiar sound.

"Hey stranger," she smiled as she dropped her bags and wrapped her arms around the blonde that she once had immense feelings for. "How is she?" she asked once he pulled away and gathered her bags.

"She's not coping well. Well, I mean she pretends that she is but she's not. She's so broken and I can't fix her all by myself. I need you and Haley."

"And Nathan too," the blonde insisted as Lucas dropped her bags into the truck of his car.

"Look Peyton," Lucas turned to the tortured artist as he started the engine. "I don't know what Haley told you but things are messy between her and Nathan."

"They can put their shit aside for Brooke!" Peyton exclaimed with disbelief. "I don't even know if Brooke will talk to me but I'm trying. I'm putting a high school grudge behind me for the sake of my best friend and they can do the same for her!"

"Nathan might not even be willing to help," Lucas answered as she began to pull out of the parking lot. "He doesn't even know about Brooke being home yet and he was so upset when she left."

"Drop me off at his house," Peyton insisted harshly as she glanced over at the blonde.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me Luke. You take my bags over to Haley's place and I will talk to Nathan. Brooke needs him too!"

"Fine," he huffed as he pulled a quick U-turn and headed towards Nathan's house.

* * *

"I'm coming!" Nathan hollered as he jogged over to the door and pulled it open, an annoyed expression spread across his face.

"Geez, do you have to knock like fifty times and that loud?" Nathan growled. "Peyton?"

"Hey buddy," she laughed as he opened his arms for her. "How are you holding up?"

"I've seen better days," he shrugged as he let her in. "Care to tell me why you're here? I haven't seen you in like three years."

"Luke called me," she answered as she sat on the couch.

"You mean Luke as in my brother, Luke?"

"Yeah," she nodded as he handed her a glass of water.

"I didn't know you two were on speaking terms."

"Haley made him call me," she answered nonchalantly as she took a long sip of water.

"Why?" Nathan questioned as he joined the blonde on the couch. "I mean you and Haley haven't talked much in the last few years either."

"It's about Brooke…"

"Peyton," Nathan offered her a small smile and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I know that you love Brooke and she will always be your best friend but she hasn't been to Tree Hill in five years. Nobody has seen or heard from her in five years. I mean other than on TV or in magazines…"

"No, Nathan," Peyton shook her head, blonde curls falling into her face. "She's here."

"What?" he turned to her, surprise creeping across his face. "What the hell are you talking about Peyton? She disappeared five years ago without a trace or a single phone call. She just vanished."

"She showed up on Luke's doorstep the other day. She was attacked Nathan."

"Excuse me?"

"Look Nate, I just got here and I have yet to see Brooke but she needs our help. You and I know her better than anyone. We have been friends with her since we were eight years old Nate, we are practically like siblings and her mother hired someone to attack her. We can't just ignore the fact that she is broken because of some high school grudge. You need to let it go and help Brooke get through this because I know that you are still that guy."

"Victoria attacked her?" It came out as a croak but Peyton didn't miss the anger brewing in Nathan's voice.

She nodded and Nathan's fist collided with the coffee table. "That bitch! If I ever see her face, she will be fucking dead. You understand me? Fucking dead!"

"There's the Nathan I know. The Nathan that would protect his friends no matter what," Peyton smiled as she stood up and grabbed her coat. "Now take me over to Luke's. We have a damaged brunette to tend to."

* * *

_AN: I'M BACK! Yes, I know it's been super long but the month of January has been extremely hard for me. I've had three diploma exams and two in class finals on top of numerous essays, quizzes, and unit finals. But I am done with semester one and I only have two classes, one of which is through distance learning and does not require me to actually be at school. This means that I will have so much free time to update considering I'm done school by ten o'clock. I hope that I didn't lose any readers because of my absence but I promise that updates will be much faster now and I will work like hell to catch up. Next chapter will be Julian's introduction, BREYTON AND BRATHAN interaction as well as more Brucas of course and a flashback of Naley's divorce. Also, did anyone watch the latest episode of One Tree Hill? I hate how they go from Brooke almost dying to having a bachelorette party. I mean the episode was super funny, not gonna lie I haven't laughed that hard on the show ever but still they could've put another episode in between where Brooke and the others deal with her damn near dying. It upsets me that all the other core 5 characters have been in the hospital and had life threatening accidents and then finally it happens to Brooke and then bam next week she's riding a mechanical bull at her bachelorette party. I mean come one, that's just not cool. With that being said, I am SUPER excited for Brulian's wedding tomorrow. Anyways, that's enough of my rambling. The song used is 'It's Been Awhile' by Staind. It's possibly one of my all time favorite songs. Love it. Please review and lemme know what you thought. Reviews=Speedier updates._


	4. Flowers For A Ghost

_**DISCLAIMER: I do not own One Tree Hill, unfortunately Mark Schwann does. I do not own the song 'flowers for a ghost' either, Thriving Ivory does.**_

_**Anyways, here is the next chapter in Fix Me. I hope you all enjoy and don't be afraid to leave your comments behind.**_

_**You disappear with all your good intentions**_**  
**_**And all I am is all I could not mention**_**  
**_**Like who will bring me flowers when it's over  
And who will give me comfort when it's cold**_

_**xxxx**_

"Brooke…" Lucas sighed as he placed a hand on the brunette's shoulder. "I need you to talk to me."

"I don't feel like talking," she responded plainly as she flipped through a fashion magazine, her eyes focused on an article rather than on the desperate blonde that was trying to reach out to her. Lucas looked over at Haley helplessly. Haley nodded her head as she stood up and snatched the magazine from Brooke's hand.

"HALEY!"

"Sorry Brooke but it had to be done," she answered seriously. "We need to know how long you are planning on being here. Are you just gonna skip town again or are you planning on staying here?"

"I want to stay," Brooke answered quietly as she looked at her hands.

"I want to believe you Brooke but I'm afraid that you'll leave us again. I understand that you are going through hell right now but you have to let us in."

"I can't go back to New York," she responded meekly. "It's only a reminder of my heartless mother and the hell that she put me through.

"Okay," Lucas nodded his head, satisfied with her answer. "I will go to New York next week and gather your belongings."

"Lucas its okay, you don't have to do that..."

"I want to," he responded simply. The sound of the door opening broke all three adults from conversation. "I'll be right back." Lucas excused himself from the room to greet his guests.

* * *

Peyton sucked in a deep breath, her hand locked with Nathan's as they entered Lucas's living room. The house was still the same as she remembered. Nothing had changed over the years, an indication that Lucas probably hadn't changed that much either.

Sitting on the couch was Brooke Davis. She looked just as beautiful as Peyton remembered, except that there were a few faded bruises scattered across her face. She looked vapid, like the life had been sucked right from her. Her hazel eyes did not shine and her dimples were not showing. Haley's arm was wrapped around her and as soon as Nathan and Peyton entered the room her head shot up.

"What the hell is this? Some kind of fucking intervention?" The anger and the pain in her voice, fueled by years of silence and unresolved differences, did not go unnoticed by Peyton.

"Brooke…" Peyton spoke and she tried to make her way over towards the distressed brunette. However, it was like she couldn't move. She was frozen.

"I don't wanna hear it Peyton!" she held her hand up angrily. "It's been five years and now you decide to contact me?"

"The phone goes two ways Brooke."

"I was waiting for you to contact me and I don't know maybe apologize for the pain that you put me through!" she roared, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "You can't just come back here and expect the pain that you caused to just magically erase itself. Whose idea was this?" he looked at Lucas and Haley expectantly, demanding an answer.

"Mine," Lucas answered coyly as he took in a deep breath, preparing himself for the wrath he was about to get. "I thought that maybe if you had all of your friends here to help you, the healing process might be easier…"

"Well you thought wrong," she growled as she stood up, turned around and headed for the backyard.

"I've got it," Lucas sighed as he slipped his shoes on and followed the broken brunette out the door.

* * *

"Mind if I sit?" he asked, his eyes shifting over towards the girl he was still madly in love with.

"I can't believe you would invite Peyton here after knowing all the pain that she has caused us in the past Lucas! God, how could you be so _stupid_?" She shook her head bitterly as he sat down next to her on the sand.

"I thought it would help Brooke…"

"Well, it won't. I cut Peyton from my life long after I gave up hope that she'd call."

"She's your best friend Brooke…"

"Correction Lucas, she _was_ my best friend. I forgave her for stealing my boyfriend once but twice, that's too much to forgive."

"She didn't steal me Brooke. I never dated her after we broke up…"

"No," Brooke shook her head, brunette tresses falling into her face. "But she tried to date you. That doesn't make it right. I understand that she had feelings for you but she didn't even think about how I might feel before making a move on you."

"It's been five years Brooke. People change. She's willing to help you after five years of not talking and she's here now. Can't you just forgive her? You forgave me."

"It sounds to me like history is repeating itself. You give me speeches of love and convince me that I'm the one for you then you turn around and make it all about Peyton! Because, let's face it Lucas, it's always been about Peyton."

"That's not true," he shook his head and grabbed Brooke's chin, tilting it towards his. "I want you to know that Peyton will never be you. She will always be a dear friend but I do not have any feelings for her. It's never been about Peyton. It's always been about you. I wrote a book about our relationship for crying out loud Brooke!"

"Lucas… I want to believe you but I don't know if I can…"

"There you go again putting up those walls!" he shook his head before crashing his lips onto hers. It was a soft but sweet kiss that didn't last nearly long enough.

"_Why?"_ she asked harshly as she momentarily closed her eyes and ran a finger across her lips. _"Why_ are you doing this to me?"

"I love you Brooke and I will do anything to show you that…"

"I can't Lucas. I have to get out of here." She could feel her head spinning as a wave of different emotions ran through her mind. Insecurity. Pain. Indecisiveness. Nostalgia.

* * *

She was running, when she felt her body collide with a muscular wall. She looked up and saw Nathan Scott standing before her, a slight smile on his face. "Hey," he grinned as he scratched is head. "Can we uh…talk?"

"Sure," she nodded her head towards the boy that had been her friend since she was a little girl. "Let's take a walk."

"I thought you were upset with me. I mean Haley said that you were really angry with me for leaving without a trace…"

"I was," he cut in as he ran a hand through his brunette locks. "God, I was so upset with you Brooke. You weren't there for me or my family during the hardest time of my life. I lost my dream, I lost my family and where were you? I needed you more than anything when I went through a divorce and learned that I may never be able to play basketball ever again. The two most important things in my life were ripped away from me and I didn't have my best friend to get me through the pain."

"Nate, I'm sorry… I didn't…"

"I get it Brooke; you had a life of your own but what about Jamie? Didn't you ever want to meet your godson? Do you know how hard it was explaining to him why he didn't know his Aunt Brooke?"

She swallowed a lump of guilt as she saw the pain flicker in Nathan's dull blue eyes. "I would love to meet him Nathan… I think I owe you that much."

"Why did you come if you're so upset with me?" she asked once they stopped walking.

"You're my best friend Brookie. I wouldn't have made it through the years without you as my crutch. When I had issues with Peyton, you were there to be the buffer between us. Without you, I wouldn't have met Haley. You helped me overcome my problems with Dan because you understood the position that I was in and you are the only person that has ever truly related to me. When I heard you were attacked, I had to come. You weren't there for me during my time of need and I won't do the same to you. I'm going to be here for you in your time of need."

"Nathan, come here," Brooke whispered as she wrapped her arms around him. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't here. I didn't even realize the pain that I had caused. But, I'm here now and I'm going to help you fix your marriage and become the person that I know you are."

* * *

Brooke sighed as she sat up in bed. After returning from her walk with Nathan, she had decided to take a little nap to help her relax because her emotions were still running on high. She pulled open the drawer beside her bed to grab her cellphone but found herself pulling an old tattered photo album out instead. She smiled as she flipped it open. There were pictures of her, Nathan, and Peyton when they had considered themselves to be the three musketeers. There were pictures of her and Lucas and her and Haley. There were pictures of the five of them and other pictures of her friends from High School. There were pictures of her and Millicent. She missed Millie so badly; she had become her most constant friend over the years. Then there were pictures of her and Julian. He was the first boy that she had let in after Lucas. He was her first relationship after her failed one with Chase. She closed her eyes and suddenly she was reminiscing about the time that she had met Julian.

_**She took a plane to somewhere out in space  
To start a life and maybe change the world  
See I never meant for you to have to crawl  
No I never meant to let you go at all**_

_**xxxx**_

_He's been incredibly lonely since he arrived in New York. It's been a few months and he still has yet to meet a real friend. He sits alone at a barstool in an upscale New York bar, nursing a drink when he sees her. Her unmistakably raspy voice is what captures his attention first. She's sitting at the end of the bar; laughing at something the bartender is saying and downing a copious amount of alcohol. She tilts her head to the side and smiles, which is something that he finds incredibly sexy. Two cherry red lips line two perfectly straight rows of pearly white teeth, accompanied by two gorgeous dime-sized dimples. Long chocolate tresses spill midway down her back, falling into slight waves and two almond shaped hazel eyes glisten. Despite the fact that she looks completely cheerful, he can tell that she is just as broken as he is. There is just something in her eyes that tell him she lives a fairly lonely life but is rather good at hiding it. Her body is perfect, he notes, as she leans forward. He gets a pretty good glimpse of her cleavage, which is enough to make any man salivate in his mouth. She catches him staring at her and shoots him a quick smile before swinging one skinny jean clad leg over the barstool and making her way towards him, her heels clicking against the floor. _

"_Why don't you take a picture? It'll last longer," she teased as she slid onto the barstool next to him, her dimples in full swing. _

_He grunted and rolled his eyes at her before calling the bartender for another drink. "So you don't speak?"_

"_What do you want?" he asked rather rudely as he pushed his empty glass towards the bartender for a refill. _

"_I was just trying to make conversation. Judging by the way you were looking at me, I was beginning to think that you were lonely and maybe wanted some company… but I can just leave," she grumbled before swinging her legs over the barstool and preparing to leave._

"_Wait," he closed his eyes as he spoke. "I'm just really bitter I guess. I didn't mean to take it out on you."_

"_Well now I'm intrigued," she shot him a look of interest before sinking back onto the barstool. "Why would a guy as handsome as yourself be so bitter? Bad breakup or something?"_

"_You think I'm handsome?" he shot her that ought-to-be-illegal grin that managed to get him into many hearts and beds in the past._

"_I was just stating the obvious," she shrugged as her arm reached out to grab her shot glass. "But you didn't answer my question." She brought the shot glass to her lips, flung her head back, and allowed the alcohol to seep into her system. She sent him an elegant smile before reaching up to wipe the stray liquid from her mouth._

"_Not quite. I didn't really want to relocate to New York for a few months for work. I'm not a fan of the city. I've been here two months and everyone is already so hostile. People in LA were so much friendlier."_

"_I hear you," she nodded in agreement. "I come from a small town in North Carolina, though I did live in LA for a few summers when I was younger, and New York is just too much. But my life is here and my dream is here so I don't have much other choice…"_

"_So what do you do for a living then?" he asked casually as he took a long swig of his drink, enjoying the buzz that was surging through his body. _

"_I'm a fashion designer," she shrugged. "I run a company called Clothes Over Bro's and the headquarters are situated in New York so being the CEO, I am required to live here."_

"_Wow," he let out a small whistle. "The CEO of a company at such a young age, that's impressive."_

"_And what do you do for a living Mr. Big Shot?" she teased with the raise of two perfectly plucked eyebrows. _

"_I'm a movie producer," he responded sheepishly, a boyish grin spreading across his handsome face. "You know gorgeous, you haven't given me a name yet."_

"_Wanna get out of here?" she suggested with the kink of an eyebrow._

"_Well, I highly doubt that's your name," he chuckled. "And we just met, what makes you think I wanna get out of here with a stranger?"_

"_Well, I remember you saying that everyone in New York seems hostile and I was just trying to be friendly," she stated plainly as she stood up and reached for her tab. _

_She sent him a small smile before turning on her heel and pushing the large double door to the quiet bar open. As he watched her saunter away, his gut reaction was to chase after the intriguing and overly cheery brunette. _

"_Wait!" he called as he pushed the door open, spilling out into the crowded streets of New York. She was leaning against a lamp post, trying to get the attention of a taxicab driver._

_She turned and sent him another gorgeous smile. "Change your mind much?"_

"_Where are we going?" he asked curiously as he hopped into the cab next to the stunningly spontaneous brunette. _

"_You'll see," she smirked as she rested her hands against the back of her head and let out a deep breath. _

"_Do you normally invite strangers into your home?"_

"_Depends," she smiled as she reached into her purse and pulled out her key. She slid the key into the lock and pushed the door open, revealing a beautiful and exceptionally large but strangely empty apartment. _

"_Nice place," he noted as he took in the surroundings around him. From what he could see she was a fairly tidy person and there wasn't much to her apartment except for the essentials and everything that she did have was top of the line. _

"_Want something to drink?" She broke him from his thoughts as she dropped her purse on the couch and slipped into the kitchen. "Wine?" she suggested as she reached into a cupboard and pulled an expensive bottle of wine out._

_He nodded as he wiped his hands on his jeans nervously. He hadn't been this nervous around a girl in a very long time. _

"_Make yourself at home," she suggested as she poured two glasses of wine and jerked her head towards the couch._

"_You still haven't given me a name yet," he smiled as he sunk onto the couch, her sliding in beside him. _

"_I like being mysterious," she whispered seductively in his ear as she took a sip of wine. _

"_Well you're a mystery alright," he chuckled as he turned to face her, a smile planted on his face. "Wanna play a game?"_

"_What kind of game?" she purred as she slid a little bit closer to him._

"_A ten questions type of game. We take turns asking each other questions and we have to answer them about each other."_

"_I can go for that," she agreed as she flipped her brunette hair over her shoulder and set her wine glass down on the coffee table._

"_Well a name would be a nice start," he suggested as he wiggled his eyebrows at her._

"_Brooke," she smiled as she offered her hand out for him to shake. "Brooke Davis."_

"_Pretty name," he grinned as he dropped her hand. "The name's Julian Baker."_

"_So where are you from?"_

"_Well," he sent her a small smile. "I'm from LA, born and raised. You?"_

"_Tree Hill," she smiled as she grabbed a photo album from the coffee table drawer and flipped it open. "These are my best friends from that town," she grinned as she ran her fingers along the faded pictures. _

"_It must be nice to still keep in contact with your high school friends," he offered her a smile as he noticed the look of nostalgia cross her face. _

"_We haven't kept in contact and it's mostly my fault," she looked down shamefully as she closed the album. "I pushed them away."_

"_I'm sorry," he said softly as he reached over and gently placed his hand on top of hers._

"_It's okay," she shrugged as she wiped away a small tear from her eye._

"_So…" he trailed on as he racked his brain for a question to ask the inexplicable brunette. "Have you ever been in love?"_

_It was a simple question but it took her by complete surprise. _

"_Once," she answered quietly as she traced imaginary patterns on her jean clad leg with a perfectly manicured fingernail. "It was in High School and I was sixteen when I fell in love with…"_

"_Let me guess this boy," Julian chuckled as he pointed to the blonde boy that had his arms wrapped around her in the picture of the opened photo album on the coffee table. _

"_What gave it away?" she chuckled as a wave of nostalgia hit her._

"_I can just tell by the way you two look at each other," he shrugged as he closed the photo album. "What happened if you don't mind me asking?"_

"_We grew apart, stopped having meaningful conversations and when you have to question your love for someone you have a problem. I guess we were just headed in two different directions and it was for the best. I mean I was in High School, what did I know about love?" she chuckled bitterly as she gulped the rest of her drink down. "So have you ever been in love?"_

"_Never," he shook his head. "My parents had a bad marriage and I always told myself that I'd never let them dictate my happiness but I did. I put up these walls around my heart because I was so afraid of ending up like them. It was just easier to not let my guard down because then I couldn't get hurt. But now that I'm older, I'm ready to let those walls down," he smiled as he cocked his head towards her. "I just haven't found the right girl yet."_

"_You know, after Lucas I did the same thing. My parents were also trapped inside a bad marriage and I never believed in love until Lucas. After he broke my heart, I just shut everyone out. I haven't been in a serious relationship since because I'm scared to commit again, so I put up those walls. I'd like to break them down too," she smiled as she turned to him and moved closer towards him. Their lips were just mere inches apart when he pulled back and smiled._

"_I really enjoyed talking to you Brooke. It was just what I needed but I should probably head home," he said as he glanced at the clock. "Maybe I could get your number and we can go out for dinner tomorrow?"_

"_Yeah," she smiled hopefully as she handed him her phone and allowed him to enter his information in it. "Well, I'll see you around," she smiled as she led him towards the door. _

"_I had a nice time tonight Brooke," he grinned as he leaned forward and slowly captured her lips in a soft, sweet kiss. "I look forward to seeing you tomorrow." With that he pulled the door open and sent her a grin before disappearing through the door. _

_She smiled as she pressed her fingers to her lips. Maybe she could finally move on and get over the fact that she was still completely hung up on Lucas. She knew that she couldn't hold on forever and it was about time she let go._

Brooke smiled as she pulled out of the memory. Julian had been a great boyfriend and he had been the first person that she had opened up to after breaking up with Lucas in high school. He was everything that she could hope for in a boy. He was smart, kind, funny, and above all, he was like her. He understood exactly what it was like to put up walls around your heart and he knew what it was like to have your best friend and love of your life sneak around behind your back. But he wasn't Lucas. And it didn't matter how hard she tried to pretend that he was, because nobody else could ever fill that empty void in her heart that ached for her first love. But it was nice while it lasted she thought as she closed the photo album and shoved it into the drawer beside her bed.

_**See my head aches from all this thinkin'  
Feels like a ship God, God knows I'm sinkin'  
Wonder what you do and where it is you stay  
These questions like a whirlwind, they carry me away**_

_**xxxx**_

"Hey, can I come in?" A familiar voice drifted through the door, causing a frown to grace Brooke's face.

She didn't even wait for a reply before pushing the door open.

"Did I say you could come in?" the brunette asked rudely as she grabbed her blackberry and pretended to scroll through it busily.

"Look, Brooke, we need to talk okay?"

"Fine. Talk," Brooke growled without emotion as she folded her arms over her chest and stared into Peyton's green eyes. Fear. Pain. Regret. She could read Peyton like an open book.

"I'm sorry…"

Brooke snorted. "Sorry about what? That you tried to steal my boyfriend or that you never kept in contact over the last five years?"

"Both," she sighed, sitting herself on the edge of the bed. "How did we end up like this Brooke? We used to be best friends, we were like sisters and now I found out that you were attacked by Victoria through Lucas. I wish that it could have been you that told me. I just, I want our friendship back. I've changed Brooke, I'm not the same Peyton that I was in high school. I need my best friend and I know that she needs me too." Tears fell from her green eyes impetuously as she spoke.

"Peyton," Brooke whispered as she wrapped her arms around her ex-bestfriend, surprising both herself and the blonde. "I can forgive but I don't forget. I don't think we'll ever be the same. Too many years have gone by. Too many years that we've been torn apart and angry at each other."

"I think you're right Brooke," Peyton nodded her head in agreement. "We will never be the same and I caused that. I let a boy get in between us. But, I need you in my life. Even if it's just as a friend and not a best friend, I'm okay with that."

"It's gonna take time Peyton. I can't just trust you again okay? I can put this grudge behind us but I can't let you in all the way. Not yet."

"God, I've missed you ," she smiled as she ran her hand through her curly blonde locks. "And when you're ready to tell me what happened, I'll be here to listen."

"It was jealousy," she spoke, causing Peyton to turn her head in surprise. "She hired someone to attack me because she was jealous of the life that I had built. She was jealous that she didn't have it. I fired her and the next day I was attacked. Ironic don't you think?"

"Brooke…" she wrapped her arms around the sobbing brunette. "Victoria is a heartless bitch…"

"She's always made me feel like I'm not enough. I don't even know why my life is worth living anymore if I'm so fucking pathetic."

Fear overtook Peyton's mind as she listened to the brunette speak so coldly. It scared her. "Brooke… look at me," she demanded, turning the brunette's head to face her own. "I know that pleasing Victoria is the one goal you've always strived to achieve so I can understand where this anger is coming from but you can't let her dictate your happiness. You do have a reason to believe that your life is worth living. You have Lucas, and Haley, and Nathan, and me, and Jamie to live for. We are your family and we love you Brooke. That is why we are all here. We are putting high school grudges and years of silence and pain behind us to fix you. We all owe you that much."

"Thank you," the brunette mumbled as tears spilled from her eyes.

A small smile graced Lucas's face as he watched Peyton hold a crying Brooke. Today had been a major breakthrough even if it had dug up old wounds and caused pain.

* * *

_**Who will bring me flowers when it's over  
And who will give me comfort when it's cold  
And who will I belong to when the day just won't give in  
And who will tell me how it ends and how it all begins**_

**_xxxx_**

"Hey," Lucas smiled into the phone as he glanced at the business card. "It's me, Lucas."

"Lucas. Hey man, what's up?"

"I thought about your offer and I'd like to take you up on it. All four of the major characters from the book are here and I think now would be a good time to get my life back on track. This could be it…"

"Great," Julian smiled as he rifled through some paperwork on his cluttered desk. "I can be in Tree Hill by next week to meet with you and start planning the film. I was thinking Tree Hill would be a good destination to film it considering that it is the town where it all happened."

"Sounds good," Lucas nodded as he wrote down the information. "I'll see you next week."

Julian smiled as he hung up the phone. He was going to get the one girl that he let slip away back.


	5. Shattered

_**Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding  
Fall into your sunlight  
The future's open wide beyond believing  
To know why hope dies  
Losing what was found, a world so hollow  
Suspended in a compromise  
The silence of this sound is soon to follow  
Somehow sundown**_

_**xxxx**_

Lucas Scott smiled as he took in the familiar city. He'd spent many of his days over the last five years in this city promoting his novel and trying to follow up the novel's success with another novel. He was standing in front of Brooke's apartment building in New York, preparing himself to pack up the last of her things. She claimed that she didn't have a lot of things to be brought back but somehow Lucas didn't believe that. Brooke Davis loved to shop and she loved to spend money. He felt strangely out of place as he entered the building. He was wearing a pair of old jeans with a t-shirt and a pair of scuffed up sneakers but everyone else entering the building was wearing fancy dress clothes and nicely pressed suits with shiny shoes. He kept his head down as he reached the elevator, the sound of heels clicking against the marble floor in perfect rhythm driving him nuts. He looked at the piece of paper in his hand, decorated in Brooke's distinctive handwriting, and pressed the button for the top floor. It was a long ride up the skyscraper high building to her penthouse suite. The elevators only other occupant was a stiff uptight woman with her hair in a tight bun and her nose held high in the air. As he stepped out of the elevator he sent the woman a polite smile and headed down the hall in the direction of Brooke's suite.

He wasn't surprised when he pushed open the door at what he found. The apartment was very Brooke-like. Large but empty. She had always lived an extravagant life but he'd noticed how she liked the simple things in life. She didn't need to have all the extra accessories. He placed his sports jacket on a barstool and ran his fingers along the smooth countertops. A smile made its way across his face as he pictured Brooke trying to cook. He looked around the room and sighed. Where the hell did he start? He had rented a u-haul and Nathan had offered to allow Brooke to keep her things in his storage room until she bought a house in Tree Hill.

* * *

Several hours later and most of Brooke's belongings were packed away in boxes and placed in the rented u-haul. There were just a few things left in her bedroom. Lucas wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead as he swung open the closet to grab the last few of her possessions. He was reaching up high for a few various pieces of clothing that were scattered across the top rack when he knocked over the box. The contents spilled and he bent down to pick them up instinctively. He was surprised to see the things that he did. There were high school yearbooks from each year that she'd spent at Tree Hill High, her old cheerleading uniform, several newspaper articles which mentioned the ravens or the cheer squad, and a wide variety of pictures from her high school years. He recognized some of the pictures from before their lives had even collided. Most of those pictures were of her wasted at parties with Nathan and Peyton. He was stuffing the high school reminiscent photos and memorabilia into the box when a picture caught his eye. It was very faded and he noticed that it was ripped into three parts. It was a picture of Brooke. One in which she looked oddly familiar, he was sure that he had one of the same at home. He reached back into the pile of photos and pulled out the other two pieces. There was one of Peyton and one of himself and sure enough the fit perfectly together. The love triangle from hell, he thought as he stuffed the three pieces of the picture back into the box. He was shocked when he picked up the last of the spilled contents. There were about thirty letters tightly bound together with a tie, each addressed to him. He was confused because he hadn't returned those letters to her in High School; he'd kept them in his closet in a similar box. He knew that snooping through her private belongings was wrong but in all fairness to him, the letters were addressed to _him. _They were not sealed so he quickly unfolded the last letter, noticing that it was dated back to a few years ago.

_Dear Lucas,_

_Last summer I wrote you 82 letters, one a day, but I never sent them because I was afraid of you and the way that you made me feel. And I guess I still am. I've only been here in New York for a few years and it's a nice city. I could see myself being happy here. Writing those letters to you last summer helped me get my emotions out so I decided to write you more letters but this time I'm not giving them to you. Not now and not ever. I'm so confused right now. I hate you so much. I hate you for breaking my heart and for cheating on me with my best friend TWICE, I hate you for getting in between my best friend and I and tearing our friendship apart, I hate you for dictating my happiness and most of all I hate you for making me feel this way; alone, worthless, weak, powerless, insecure. I hate it. But if I hate you so much, then why do I still love you so much? I don't understand it and it beats the shit out of me. I want to feel again but I can't. It's like I'm stuck in the past and everything I see reminds me of you. But tonight I'm making a promise to myself, I will never fall in love with you again and I will never let you get close to me again. Tonight I will let go. You see, tonight I met this guy. His name doesn't really matter but what does is that I'm going to finally let myself be happy and stop pushing people away. I've already pushed everyone I've ever loved away and cut them from my life entirely. I've lost everybody that I've ever cared about and as much as I want to blame you I can't because I did it myself. He won't be you no matter how hard I try to convince myself that he's replacing you in my heart, but I'll just have to pretend. So yeah Lucas, I hate you for what you've done to me but I hate myself even more for letting you do it, for letting me feel this way, and for making me insecure and incapable of loving someone. So I hope it was all worth it in the end. I hope you got what you wanted and I hope you have a nice life with Peyton Sawyer. I can see you rolling your eyes at this if you were to read it but it's true. Although the history is always gonna be there between you and me, Peyton is your other half, the one that you want standing next to you when your dreams come true. I was always just the footnote, the roadblock standing in your way. This is the last letter I will write to you. I'm done feeling this way and I'm done letting you dictate my happiness even when you're not here. I will always love you for showing me the immensity of love and for loving me when nobody else would but tonight I'm letting go of the past. I'm letting go of you because no matter how much I want it to be, love isn't gonna be enough for us. Not this time. _

_Love, Brooke._

Lucas could feel a small tear slip from his eye as he shoved the letter back in the envelope and placed the other stack of letters in the box, tightly shutting the lid and scooping it up in his arms. He could hear those cruel words in her letter haunting him. "I'm letting go of you because no matter how much I want it to be, love isn't gonna be enough for us. Not this time." And, "So yeah Lucas, I hate you for what you've done to me but I hate myself even more for letting you do it, for letting me feel this way and for making me insecure and incapable of loving someone."

He took one look around the room before flicking the light off. She was just speaking from a place of anger, he convinced himself as he shut the bedroom door and scanned the house, and making sure that he had everything of Brooke's. He turned back around and pulled the door open to leave, only to be met with a face. He'd never met the woman but he knew who she was. She looked like an older version of Brooke. Her long raven hair fell to her shoulders and her brown eyes had a spiteful glare that sent chills down his spine.

"What are you doing here?" he seethed, his own glare matching hers.

"I could ask you the same," she smirked as she pushed past him. She turned back around and glared at him. "Where is everything?"

"I'm taking it back home with me Victoria," he announced coldly. "Your daughter no longer lives in New York."

"How the hell do you know my name? Who are you?"

"Lucas," he smiled cockily as he extended his hand out towards the older brunette woman. "Lucas Scott. I don't believe we've met before."

She looked him up and down with a disgusted look. "So this is the boy that ruined my daughter's life? I never understood why she kept coming back to you after you left her for her best friend."

"I never left her for Peyton!" Lucas growled as he made his way towards the door. "Goodbye Victoria."

"But you cheated on her."

He turned around and sent her the coldest glare he could. "You don't know shit! If you would stop trying to make everyone miserable and you opened up your eyes for one fucking second maybe you'd realize the world doesn't revolve around you. I didn't wreck Brooke's life. You did. You made her a pawn in your fucking game and then you attacked her. And just so you know, I'm not giving up, I will prove that you attacked her and I will put you behind bars. You may have gotten away with stealing Brooke's company but you won't get away with this."

Then he was gone.

* * *

**And finding answers  
Is forgetting all of the questions we call home  
Passing the graves of the unknown**

**As reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading**  
**Illusions of the sunlight**  
**And the reflection of a lie will keep me waiting**  
**Love gone for so long**

**This day's ending is the proof of time killing all the faith I know  
Knowing that faith is all I hold**

"You wanted to see me?"

The brunette cocked her head as she turned her body to face the familiar voice. The voice that she now hated with an undying passion.

"How could you do this to me? How could you do this to her?" She could feel a tear almost fall from her tired brown eyes. Almost. But Victoria Davis didn't cry.

"I thought this is what you wanted?" he emphasized, his lips curving into a smirk. "I thought you wanted her out of the way so that you could have the company all to yourself."

"No," she shook her head at the heartless man standing before her. "I wanted you to simply steal the designs from her. I never asked you to physically hurt her. God, how could you be so stupid?"

"Oh, well that was just an added benefit." He gave her a sinister smirk as he clasped his hands together anxiously. "You see Victoria, I could have loved her but she was incapable of loving me. She hurt me so badly. She destroyed me, ripped my heart into a million pieces and left me behind to bleed. Do you know how that made me feel? And the worst part is that she didn't even feel remorseful about any of it. I wanted her to feel the same pain that she made me feel. I wanted her to bleed."

"You wonder why she left you huh?" Victoria sneered back, her eyes burning up with a passionate hate. "She left you because you treated her like shit! My marriage was the exact same way and she didn't want to end up in a marriage like mine, so she got out while she had the chance."

"It doesn't matter now does it?" he asked with a sly grin. "She thinks you hired someone to attack her and she'll never believe you."

"I hate you," she growled coldly before turning her back on the man before her. "You ruined my life."

"No, I think you ruined that yourself," he chuckled lightly, giving her another vindictive smile before walking right back out the door.

Her mind took her back to the day she'd approached him about stealing Brooke's designs. That day would forever be imprinted in the back of her mind because it was also the day that she'd made the biggest mistake of her life.

_**FLASHBACK**_

_Anger coursed through her body as she stared harshly at the walls of her apartment. She grabbed the picture off the table and hurled it with brutal force at the wall, watching it crash into a million pieces._

"_How could she do this to me?" the brunette hissed venomously. She'd given her daughter the best life she could have ever asked for. She'd made her daughter a multimillionaire by the age of 22 and surely to god Brooke could not have done that alone. And now she goes and fires her. Brooke was going to pay for her actions. Victoria was going to steal her sketches and present them to the board before Brooke had a chance to do so. Without those sketches she is nothing and she has nothing._

_A sly smile crossed the older brunette woman's face as she reached for her blackberry and scrolled through her contacts, stopping as she reached the name of a man that she absolutely despised, although she did have to admit that he was impressively aggressive and vindictive. He was one of the most coldhearted people she had ever met in her entire life and they shared one thing in common. In this very moment they both hated Brooke Davis with everything inside of them. Brooke had broken his heart just months ago. Their relationship had been short-lived and full of dramatic twists and tumultuous turns. He was aggressive, abusive if you will, and he'd nearly ended Brooke's life once. She knew that he would steal those designs for her because he wanted to see Brooke fail just as much as she did. She took in a deep breath as she hit the green button and held the device to her ear impatiently. _

"_Hello?"_

"_Hey, it's me. Victoria. Listen, I know you hate me and trust me, the feeling is mutual. But, I have a proposition for you."_

"_Now I'm intrigued. What kind of a proposition?" he asked with the raise of his eyebrows. _

"_You and I share one thing in common. We both want to see Brooke Davis lose her dreams. She fired me from the company this morning and now I'm seeking revenge. I want you to steal her designs for me and then I will present them to the board. What do you say?"_

"_And what do I get out of it?"_

"_You get to see Brooke Davis go through pain. You know just as much as I do that she is nothing without that company and as soon as it's gone, she will have nothing."_

"_Good point," he nodded his head interestedly. "I love making people suffer. Especially those that hurt me."_

"_So you'll do it?"_

"_Hell yeah, I'll do it." His lips curved into a belligerent smirk as he took a swig of the bottle in his hand. "Tomorrow night Brooke Davis is going to get a taste of her own damn medicine."_

_Then the line went dead._

_**END FLASHBACK**_

_**

* * *

**_

**Who I am from the start  
Take me home to my heart  
Let me go  
And I will run  
I will not be silenced**

**All this time spent in vain  
Wasted years  
Wasted gain  
All is lost  
Hope remains  
And this war's not over**

"Jamie, I want you to meet someone," Haley smiled as she led Brooke into her house. "Hey Deb," she smiled at the older woman that was watching her son.

Brooke looked at Haley nervously and sent Deb a light smile. "Hey," she offered, her eyes glancing at the ground as she spoke.

"Nice to see you again Brooke," Deb replied back as she looked at the brunette sympathetically, having been filled in on the gist of the situation by her son and former daughter in law. "I'm going to go watch my soap opera and allow you guys to have some alone time with Jamie."

A little boy bounded into the room with a wide smile on his face. He was definitely a Scott and ironically enough looked more like Lucas than Nathan. He had sandy blonde hair, which he had inherited from his beautiful mother, and his father's icy blue eyes.

"Momma, that's the lady from the pictures right?" he asked inquisitively, his blue eyes swirling with perplexity.

"Yes Jamie. This is your Aunt Brooke," she smiled warmly as Brooke bent down to the little boy's level.

"Why does she have bruises on her face?" he asked out of the blue. But after all he was a five year old.

"Jamie!" Haley gasped, her eyes hardening at her son. "Be polite."

"Sorry," he looked down shamefully.

"It's okay buddy. I was in an accident," she answered with a disheartened smile. "But, I'm all better now," she lied.

"You mean like a car accident?"

"No," Brooke shook her head. "Not a car accident. It doesn't really matter what kind of an accident it was but I'm okay now. That's all that matters right?" she asked looking at Haley for support.

"Right," Haley nodded, her honey blonde locks shaking behind her. "So, Jamie, why don't you show Aunt Brooke your bedroom while I have a word with grandma Deb?"

"Okay," he nodded as he grabbed Brooke's hand and dragged her up the stairs.

"This is a very nice room Jamie," she smiled as he opened the door excitedly.

"This is my rabbit Chester," he grinned as he showed her the bunny cage. "He's my best friend ever."

Brooke smiled as Jamie showed her Chester, and then put him back in the cage. "Can I ask you something Aunt Brooke?" the five year old asked as he turned towards his estranged Aunt.

"Sure Buddy," she nodded for him to continue as she sat on the end of his bed.

"Why did you leave?"

Brooke was taken aback by the little boy's question. But then again he was Haley's son after all. "It's complicated Jamie… you'll understand when your older and faced with tough decisions of your own."

"I don't wanna understand when I'm older. I want to understand now," he persisted. Staring into his blue eyes reminded her of Lucas. It was almost haunting.

"I left because I had my heart broken…"

"By Uncle Lucas?" he cut in with a bright smile, glad to have known something about Brooke from the past.

"How'd you know that?"

"I eavesdrop sometimes," he shrugged innocently. "Please don't tell my mom."

"Your secret is safe with me," she smiled as she linked her pinkie with his. "And yeah, it was Uncle Lucas," she nodded her head as she spoke. "When he broke my heart, I buried myself in work and started a company. In a few short years it became a huge national success. What started out as a way to mend my broken heart ended up being the most important thing in my life."

"Why'd you come back?" he asked quietly as he looked at her with demanding eyes.

"I came back because I realized that even though I had all the money in the world, I was missing something; Love."

"You mean with Uncle Lucas?"

"No," she shook her head. "Not just that kind of love kiddo. I was missing my friendship with both your mother and your father. I was missing my friendship with Lucas," she smiled, stressing the word friendship before Lucas's name. "And I wanted to meet you, because I knew I'd love you just as much as I love your parents.

"I think you're pretty cool Aunt Brooke," Jamie smiled as he wrapped his arms around her. "I wish you weren't so sad."

She'd only spent about fifteen minutes with the kid and he could already read her better than most.

"I think you and I are gonna be great friends buddy," she grinned, her dimples showing for the first time in a very long time."

* * *

**And I've lost who I am  
And I can't understand  
Why my heart is so broken  
Rejecting your love  
Without love gone wrong  
Life  
Less words  
Carry on**

**xxxx**

"Lucas is home," Haley smiled on the drive back to Lucas's house. "I'll drop you off there and then I'll head home to keep Peyton entertained and Nathan has Jamie for the night."

"I really liked meeting Jamie today," Brooke said as she turned to face Haley. "He reminds me of you in so many ways."

"He's a good kid," Haley nodded as a smile crept across her face. "And he's being dealing with the divorce much better than I would have ever guessed he would."

"Yeah," Brooke nodded as she stared out at the streets of Tree Hill, the sun slowing sinking down over the horizon. "Today was a good day."

"It was," Haley agreed.

A comfortable silence surrounded the two women and Haley flicked on the radio to get some noise flowing through the quiet vehicle.

**Hey, girl, you know you drive me crazy  
one look puts the rhythm in my hand.  
Still I'll never understand why you hang around  
I see what's going down.**

Cover up with makeup in the mirror  
tell yourself, it's never gonna happen again  
You cry alone and then he swears he loves you.

Do you feel like a man when you push her around?  
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?  
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end  
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.

A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect  
every action in this world will bear a consequence  
If you wade around forever, you will surely drown  
I see what's going down.

I see the way you go and say you're right again,  
say you're right again  
Heed my lecture.

Do you feel like a man when you push her around?  
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?  
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end  
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found

**Face down in the dirt, she said,  
"This doesn't hurt", she said,  
"I finally had enough."**

Listening to that song brought back of string of memories. Bad memories, from one of the darkest times in her entire life.

_**FLASHBACK**_

_**It was late when she heard him come in. She glanced at the clock beside her bed and saw that it was 2:33 in the morning. She could hear his footsteps approaching the door and she tightly shut her eyes, pretending to sleep. If she was sleeping, maybe he'd leave her alone. But she highly doubted that. She wasn't with him because she loved him. She was with him because she was afraid of him. If she ever left him, she was afraid of what might follow. She would have to bear the consequences and she wasn't prepared to do that just yet. She hoped that one day, she would find the strength.**_

_**The door opened and the room filled with the strong scent of whiskey and smoke. He was an addict. He drank alcohol to numb the pain of life and to lift the burden of life from his shoulders. And he turned to drugs for the very same reason. In fact, she'd met him through Rachel. They'd gone to rehab together about a year ago and after they'd both been released, Rachel had set them up. She'd just gotten out of a relationship that had lasted almost a year and was clearly not ready to move on yet but he had been a nice guy and she decided to take it slowly and see where things headed. However, he had other plans and soon she was trapped in a deadly relationship with an abusive, alcoholic boyfriend. Shortly after his release from rehab, he had reverted back to his old ways. Nobody knew about the relationship except for her mother. One night, she'd broken down and told her mother what was going on. She trusted Victoria because she was a hard, emotionless woman and Brooke was certain that she wouldn't even feel sorry for her.**_

"_**You awake?" he whispered softly as he slid under the covers. No response. "I said are you awake?" he repeated, much louder this time. **_

"_**Yes," she grumbled, slowly sitting up and pretending to rub her 'sleep-filled' eyes. "I am now."**_

"_**What the fuck is this?" he asked harshly as he flung a piece of paper in her face.**_

_**Brooke grabbed it from him and scanned it quickly. "How the hell did you get this?"**_

"_**Earlier today, I was checking your internet history on your laptop. Guess, you should have deleted it Brooke," he chuckled bitterly. "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING SEARCHING YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND UP ON GOOGLE?"**_

_**She gulped, unable to find her voice. **_

"_**Answer me when I'm taking to you, goddamit!" he yelled, aggressively pulling her face towards his and making her look at him. **_

"_**I was just curious," she answered with a small sigh. "I was just wondering what my friends from High School were doing…"**_

"_**You still love him don't you," he questioned, his eyes full of resentment.**_

_**She didn't reply yet again.**_

"_**Answer me Brooke! You don't have the right to ignore my goddam questions!"**_

"_**Yes," she whispered as she closed her eyes momentarily. **_

"_**Well guess what Brooke?" he asked rhetorically. "You love me now. He's in your past and I'm your future. So fucking get over him. If I ever catch you searching him up again or contacting him, you'll fucking pay."**_

_**She looked at him, her eyes filled with tears. And then she stood up. It was possibly one of the dumbest things she could have done but she just wanted out.**_

"_**Where the fuck do you think you're going?" he asked vituperatively.**_

"_**I'm leaving," she whispered softly as she stood at the door, reaching up to wipe a tear from her eye. **_

"_**You're leaving?" he asked with a sinful grin. "And where the hell are you gonna go? Newsflash Brooke, nobody loves you and they never will. Your ex-boyfriend loves your best friend more than you, you have virtually no friends except for Millicent, and your own mother even hates you. Without me you are nothing!"**_

"_**Goodbye," she croaked as she turned to leave but he grabbed onto her wrist and spun her around. "You're hurting me!" she cried out in agony, his fingernails digging into her flesh. He was strong, much stronger than her. **_

"_**You're not fucking leaving me," he smirked wretchedly as he threw her against the wall. "I fucking own you."**_

"_**I'm not your property anymore," she growled as she tried to wriggle from his grasp. **_

"_**Yes you fucking are," he bit back.**_

"_**No… you're not. I'm my own person and I will…"**_

_**SLAP. His fist connecting with her cold flesh silenced her. "Don't fucking talk Brooke. Now come to bed. I'm really fucking horny."**_

"_**I'm not going anywhere with you," she hissed as she yanked herself free from his grasp. But it wasn't enough. **_

_**He threw on the floor, kicked her a few times, then started at her with disgust."You're a gutless, worthless bitch."**_

_**She was done with this. She was done feeling this way. And she was done with him. She wouldn't even allow herself to cry. Slowly she picked herself up off the floor, her eyes showing no emotions at all. She was numb inside.**_

"_**You ruined my life and I'm done being a pawn in your fucking game. Find someone else's life to make miserable but I can assure you that it won't be me. And you wonder why I'm incapable of loving you? It has nothing to do with Lucas. It has to do with you and only you. The only reason I am still in this relationship is because of fear. But, I won't let my fear of you and the things that you can do to me hold me back anymore. I'm done feeling like this. I am worth something and I don't need a piece of shit like you to tell me that I'm not." Her eyes were lifeless as she spoke those harsh words to the man that had nearly destroyed her life and made her become a person that she hated. **_

_**She placed her hand on the doorknob and pushed it open before his words stopped her. **_

"_**Fine, leave you little bitch but one day I'll be back for you and you'll get what you deserve."**_

_**END FLASHBACK**_

She felt a tear slip from her eye as she thought back on those days and the hell he'd put her through in just four short months. They were the worst four months of her entire life, but they also made her stronger. She knew that she could overcome anything after being put through that.

* * *

**_AN: Any guesses as to who might have attacked Brooke? You'll have to wait to find out! Mean, I know. Next chapter will be Julian coming to town and some Brulian and Brucas interactions as well as more Naley insight. I'm sorry that there was no Brucas in that chapter but it was a much needed chapter in order to explain the attack from Victoria's point of view and give some insight into Brooke's dark past. I promise for some more Brucas next chapter! Songs used are 'Shattered' by Trading Yesterday and 'Facedown' by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus in case anyone was wondering. Please review and lemme know what you think of this chapter. (By the way, formatting was not my friend so excuse any issues with the song lyrics)._**


	6. What Are You Looking For?

_**I walk the line of the disappointed  
I celebrate when I'm in pain  
My heart and mind can be disjointed  
I built a bed in this hole I made  
I recognize that I'm damaged  
I sympathize that you are too  
But I wanna breathe without feelin' so self-conscious  
But it's hard when the world's starin' at you**_

_**xxxx**_

She slammed the magazine shut and threw it down onto the kitchen table hard. They don't know shit. Nobody knows what happened to her and nobody knows how broken she is. They don't even know her past. They only see what just happened to her, not what she'd endured just months before. She would often relive those nights. The painful beatings, the hurtful words that stabbed her like a knife and feeling like she was worthless; they were all parts of her past that she'd tried to erase. She isn't stupid, she can hear them whispering behind her back. Everywhere she goes, someone is always whispering. She can see their pathetic stares and looks of sympathy. But, she doesn't want their sympathy. She doesn't need it. "Did you hear what happened to that Davis girl?" and "It's such a shame. She was really headed places, you know?" seem to be the most constant topics of Tree Hill's residents over morning coffee. And they think, she doesn't know. She hates being in the public eye. Now all of the people that once told her she would fail could prove her wrong.

Her phone burst out into song, tearing her away from her thoughts. She let out a grunt before picking up the device and checking to see who was calling her. It was Lucas. She let out a sigh before clicking on. He had been so supportive of her ever since she returned to Tree Hill and she would be eternally grateful for that.

"Hey Luke," she mumbled into the phone. "Have you seen the latest tabloids? They just can't seem to leave me alone huh?" she chuckled bitterly.

"I'm sorry Brooke. I wish there was something that I could do…"

"Well there isn't," she snapped, the feeling of guilt instantly washing over her. "I'm sorry… I shouldn't have said that, I'm just angry I guess. I wish they'd find someone new to stalk."

"They will," he promised as a small smile spread across his face. "I have a meeting with the producer that wants to turn my book into a movie today."

"Luke, that's great!" She tried her best to sound optimistic but the smile on her face faltered. She was afraid that Lucas would spend all of his time with the movie and then he would have no time for her and once again, she'd be all alone.

"Yeah it is," he agreed before slipping into his seat at the café. "I'm just waiting for him to arrive right now and I was wondering if you'd like to come down to the Riverside Café and meet him? You were such a big part of the book and I want you to be there."

"Of course, I'll be there. Give me ten," she smiled as she searched the pile of clothes in her room for something clean to wear. She grabbed a pair of jeans and began yanking them on. "You can order for me, I'll have the usual."

"Okay, see you soon." His phone clicked off and she grabbed her keys, checking her appearance in the mirror, before heading out the door.

* * *

"Lucas Scott. How are you doing?" Julian asked with a slight smirk as he dropped into the seat opposite Lucas.

"Great," Lucas replied as the waitress set a glass of water in front of Lucas. "Can I also get a coffee with two cream and two sugars for my friend?"

"I don't drink coffee actually. I'm more of a beer guy," Julian smiled as he glanced at the waitress.

"Not for you," Lucas smiled with the roll of his blue eyes.

"Oh, you invited someone else?"

"Yeah, she'll be here in a second," Lucas nodded as he glanced at his phone. As if on cue, Brooke came strolling through the door. "And there she is."

"I'm sorry Luke. I tried to get here as fast as I could but traffic was a bitch..." she exclaimed breathlessly. Julian would recognize that voice anywhere. He felt a small smile creep across his face.

"Hey stranger…" He turned around. "It's been awhile hasn't it?"

"Julian?" she blinked in confusion. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm a producer," he smirked. "And Lucas wrote a book so I'm making a movie out of it…" he elaborated for her.

"Well no shit," she rolled her eyes as she slipped into the seat beside Lucas. "But why? Why do you have to do this? If you're doing it to get back at me, you're wasting your time. Don't mess with Lucas."

"I'm flattered that you think this is about you sweetheart, but it's not. This is about Lucas's book and how popular it is. I happen to think that it will make a successful movie."

"I'm confused," Lucas spoke up, his eyes darting back and forth between the two. Then he remembered something. "Just ask Brooke Davis, she'll tell you." and "She's the reason I read the book and she's the reason I believe in it" ran through his head.

"Brooke and I dated back in New York…" Julian answered as he took a sip of his beer. "But it was nothing serious…"

"It was serious Julian!" she protested. "I could have loved you if you hadn't shut me out."

"But you weren't over Lucas right?"

"Don't drag him into this," she shook her head, brunette curls falling into her face.

"Look man," Lucas turned towards Julian. "Brooke and I are just friends… for now."

"Whatever," Julian shrugged. "I'm here for the book. It's good and I want to make a movie out of it. Right here in Tree Hill. What do you say?"

Lucas turned towards Brooke and looked at her expectantly. "I won't do it if you are uncomfortable with it."

"Lucas," Brooke smiled, resting her hand on top of his. "Julian and I are mature adults and we can handle this. Sure, it will be hard but we can manage because this is your dream and I would never do anything to take it away from you. I know what it is like to lose the one thing you were most proud of and I wouldn't wish it on anyone."

I've already lost the one thing I was most proud of Lucas thought as he turned back to Julian. "Okay, I'm in. Drop by TRIC tomorrow and we can start then."

"Good," Julian smiled as he stood up and grabbed the tab. "I'll see you around Davis," he winked at the brunette before leaving.

"So," Lucas looked at Brooke curiously as he leaned back in his chair. "You dated this guy?"

"Yeah…"

"I don't like him," Lucas grunted as he sipped his water. "He's arrogant and I don't like the way he flirts with you openly."

"He's just Julian," Brooke sighed. "He might come across as arrogant but inside he has the biggest heart and that was not flirting. That's just who he is."

"Well, it sure sounded like flirting to me."

"Are you jealous?" Brooke asked, kinking an eyebrow at the blonde.

"What? No!" Lucas shook his head. "That guy doesn't stand a chance," he growled. "So tell me about your relationship with him? Was it really serious?"

"Yes," she nodded her head. "We dated for just over a year."

"So if you don't mind me asking, why did you break up?"

"Just two different people from two different worlds that wanted two different things," she shrugged as she played with the straw in her drink. "It was a mutual thing. He thought that I wasn't completely over you and that was why I couldn't tell him I loved him. And he was too closed off for me and I can't be in a relationship if the other person is going to push me away." She hadn't meant for that last part to be a jab at Lucas but judging by the look on his face, he'd definitely taken it to heart.

"And this isn't gonna be weird for you?" he asked and instantly mentally slapped himself for saying that. Of course, it was gonna be weird. "I mean are you sure that you can handle this?"

"I'll be fine," she offered him a genuine smile. "Julian is in my past and he is going to stay there. We just weren't meant to be and we both accepted that so I don't see why it wouldn't be fine."

* * *

_**Another piece of the puzzle, that doesn't fit**_  
_**You throw your arms up, you're so damn sick of it**_  
_**What are you working for**_  
_**What are you searching for**_  
_**Love**_  
_**You won't be thinking of cars when**_  
_**You're on your death bed and dyin'**_  
_**You'll only be thinkin' of what you are paying for,**_  
_**What you are praying for**_  
_**Love**_

**_xxxx_**

"Where's your head at?" the blonde asked as she turned towards her friend. "You seem off."

"I was just thinking about the past," the light brunette shrugged as she reached for the TV remote and hit the mute button.

"About Nate right?" Peyton asked as she turned towards her friend, who was glancing at a picture of her family on the wall.

"Yeah," Haley sighed. "Does it get easier?"

"What do you mean does it get easier? I was never married so I wouldn't know…"

"Yeah, but you know what it is like to not be able to have someone that you love," Haley shrugged. "I mean you loved Lucas and he didn't want a relationship."

"Because he was in love with someone else and I let him go because I wanted the two people I loved most to be happy," Peyton smiled as she reflected on her past experiences in High School. "I loved Lucas and it was hard to get over him but it got easier with each passing day and now I'm completely over him. It's different with you and Nate though. There is no other girl and you have a son in the mix too. But sometimes you just have to push through the pain and fight like hell."

"Thanks Peyton," Haley smiled lightly as she glanced at her bare ring finger. Somehow those words weren't quite as comforting as they should have been.

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_**I can't keep doing this Nathan!" Haley screamed at the top of her lungs, fighting for air. "It's not working for me and this version of you does not work for me or for Jamie!"**_

"_**I love you Haley. Isn't that enough?" He asked with pleading eyes. "I promise that I'll change if you bear with me. I will try to do everything that I can to be a better man for you and for Jamie."**_

"_**Life isn't fair Nathan. When life throws you tough shit you learn to swerve. We were forced to grow up fast with having a son at only eighteen. I can't wait around for you forever. I need you to step up and be the man that I know you have the potential to be. And if you can't do that right now, then I can't keep living like this. It's not fair to Jamie or to me."**_

"_**Haley, please?" he begged, his eyes softening as he felt his family slipping away. He knew that in the blink of an eye his beautiful family could be ripped away from him. **_

"_**Love isn't always enough Nathan. God knows I love you, but I need a man who is going to be there for my family even in the toughest of times. We all go through tough times and we all learn to push through. I understand that your dreams were torn away from you and that hurt you more than anything but you still have a family. You still have a reason to continue living your life to the fullest."**_

"_**Haley…"**_

"_**I said one more night like this and I would be done," she insisted firmly as she looked around the house at the broken beer bottles scattered across the floor. They were shattered, just like her marriage. "I can't do this anymore Nathan… I'm sorry. I want a divorce."**_

_**His eyes widened in shock as visions of his family being torn away from him flooded his mind. "Haley! Please don't do this! I've already lost my career and I can't afford to lose my family!"**_

"_**Well you should have thought about that before you ripped our family apart and turned to alcohol as an escape route for your problems."**_

_**She didn't give him any time to respond before giving him a disheartened look and leaving the room, picking up empty beer bottles and shoving them into the trash can on her way out. **_

_**xxxx**_

"_**Are you sure we are doing the right thing?" Nathan asked as he closed his eyes momentarily and tried to envision his life without Haley and Jamie in it. But he couldn't. **_

"_**Yes," she answered stoically as she reached for the pen and tapped it against the desk. "Do I sign with James or Scott?"**_

"_**James I think," Nathan sighed as he sent his wife a look of pain. "Haley, are you sure that this is the solution? I mean, we can work out our problems, can't we?"**_

"_**Nathan, we have been trying to work out our problems for months now but we can't. I don't want to end up in a broken marriage a few years down the road. I mean, look at your parents…"**_

"_**I'm not Dan!" Nathan snapped, anger rushing through his body, unable to comprehend why she would compare their marriage to his parents. "And you aren't Deb."**_

"_**Not now, we aren't," she shook her head threateningly. "But that doesn't mean that we won't turn into them later on down the road."**_

"_**Haley… don't say that. Just don't okay!"**_

_**Haley sent him a look before grabbing the paper and signing her name on the designated spot. She shoved it towards Nathan. "If you really love me, you'll sign it."**_

_**He sent her a pained look before grabbing the pen from her hand and scribbling his signature on the line hesitantly. "It's really over isn't it?" he asked, turning towards his soon to be ex-wife.**_

"_**I wish it wasn't but it is," she responded, her voice cracking slightly. She sent him a small smile before grabbing the papers and turning away from him. All it took for him was to sign that damn paper and his never-ending nightmare had become reality. **_

_**END FLASHBACK**_

_**

* * *

**_

She spotted him sitting in the café reading a newspaper. It took everything inside of her to not go in there but she needed some answers.

He heard her approaching him as he looked up from his drink and smiled. "What are you doing here?" He sounded surprised to see her.

She slipped into the chair across from him and folded her arms. "I need some answers…"

"About what?"

"Why are you here Julian? The real reason, I mean. Not the reason you told Lucas today."

He sighed as he set the paper down and looked into her eyes. "I'm here for two reasons. "I do believe that the book is amazingly written and will make a good movie. But, I also believe that we aren't truly over. I'm ready to love you Brooke and to fully open my heart up to you. Ever since we broke up and you left, I've been thinking about you."

"You left Julian!" she reminded him bitterly. "You got that stupid job offer in LA and you just up and left."

"You could have come with me," he responded plainly. "We could have had an amazing life together Brooke. I'm sorry that I maybe didn't appreciate you enough but as soon as you were out of my life, I realized what I was missing."

"I love you for what you did for me okay Julian? You helped me feel again and you helped me become myself again after my break up with Lucas. But, I don't think that what we had was real love. I would love to have you as my friend but I don't think that we could ever go down that road again."

"Are you scared?" he asked pointblank. "Is it because you are afraid of getting your heart broken? Because, I've told you this before and I'll tell you again, I'm not Lucas. And I won't put you through the same pain that he put you through."

"He might have put me through pain but he also made me feel things that I've never felt before. Luke and I were young when we dated and we weren't ready. But I think that once my emotions are all sorted out, we might have a real chance this time around," she whispered softly. She saw the look of disappointment in Julian's eyes and it pained her to have hurt him because he was a genuinely good guy. Even if other people couldn't see it, she could.

"So, you're just going to turn your back on us like that?"

"I'm sorry Julian… I wish I could give you everything that you want because you deserve to be happy and have an amazing life. But, I can't give it to you because my heart doesn't belong with you. It belongs with someone else and I think that you know that."

He sent her a small smile before pushing his chair back and standing up. "I'm not ready to let you go just yet Brooke Davis. While I'm here I'm going to fight like hell to win you back. I came here for the girl in the book, the girl that I fell in love with. And I'm going to show her that she belongs with me. You'll see."

* * *

"Ugh, this is so confusing!" Brooke growled as she sent Lucas a look of bewilderment. "I don't understand why he is doing this."

"It's okay Brooke…"

"No, it isn't. I've told him time and time again that he isn't the guy for me and I will keep telling him that."

"It's gonna be fine Brooke," Lucas smiled as he wrapped his arms around the brunette. "You will figure it all out because you are a strong person. And I want you to know that whatever decision you make, I will be okay with. As long as it makes you happy because you deserve to be happy after all the shit you've been through."

"Thank you," she smiled, wiping to brush a tear from her eye. "You really are an amazing guy Luke. You know that?"

"So I've been told," he grinned. "So I talked to Victoria the other day."

Brooke blinked in surprise. "When did you run into bitchtoria?"

"While I was packing up your things in New York, I ran into her. She actually had the decency to go to your house after all she did. Can you believe that?"

"Actually, yeah, I can," Brooke answered quietly. "She doesn't think about what she's done. She feels that because she didn't physically attack me that she's not at fault. It doesn't even register to her that hiring someone to attack me is virtually the same thing. She may not have done it herself but it all hurts just the same."

"I don't understand how someone so cruel and coldhearted could spawn someone with such a big amazing heart. It just doesn't make sense to me," Lucas shook his head, a small smile spreading across his face.

"It doesn't make sense to me either," she replied with a grin. "I guess that I've just thought about how she treated me growing up and I used it as incentive to become what she never was."

"Well I'm glad that you didn't turn out like her," Lucas smiled as he stared into her hazel eyes. It killed him to see the pain still lingering in her eyes. It hurt him to know that one person had caused her this much pain and he wished that he could take it away.

"Yeah, me too," she nodded as she leaned her head against Lucas's shoulder. Becoming her mother had always been her biggest fear. It didn't matter how many times everyone convinced her that she wasn't going to become Victoria; she couldn't help but get the feeling that she would.

* * *

"Haley! Are you home?" Lucas hollered as he pushed the front door open and slipped his shoes off. He wasn't sure if Haley was home from picking Jamie up just yet. Brooke had gone to the store to grab a few things for supper and Lucas had decided to trek over to Haley's to see if her and Peyton were up for supper at his house tonight.

The only noise he heard was the hushed sound of the TV in the distance. His feet made their way over to the kitchen and he noticed that the screen door leading into the backyard was open. He found that to be extremely odd as he poked his head outside the door. Standing beside the house, a joint in between her lips, was Peyton Sawyer.

"Peyton?"

"Lucas?" she turned to him with a grave expression as she threw the joint onto the ground and stamped it out with her shoe-clad foot. "This isn't what it looks like."

"Oh really? Was cocaine not enough for you in High School?"

"Lucas," Peyton sighed as she leaned her head back against the house and took in a deep breath. "It's prescribed marijuana."

"Yeah," Lucas scoffed sarcastically. "I bet that your drug dealer prescribes you marijuana to relieve the stress that life puts on you."

"Lucas, I got it from the doctor not a drug dealer," she sighed heavily as she looked at him seriously. "I have cancer."

"What?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Aside from Brooke, Peyton was one of the strongest people he'd ever met. He never imagined that cancer would strike such an amazing individual. It just wasn't possible.

"It's hereditary Lucas. Ellie had it and now I have it."

"How long?" he asked as he closed his eyes and tried to push away what she was telling him. It just couldn't be true.

"I've known for about six months. I had chemo in LA and was in remission but it came back. I had an allergic reaction to the chemo so I just have to let fate take its course."

"Why didn't you tell anyone about this Peyton? We are your friends and we could have helped you!"

"Lucas, I didn't want to burden you guys with my problems. Brooke is going through the hardest time of her life right now and she needs me to be there for her and she needs everyone else to be there for her. I didn't want anyone to worry about me."

"You are going through the hardest time of your life too Peyton. You could die!" Lucas shut his eyes again and tried to chase his thoughts away. Peyton couldn't die. It just wouldn't be fair.

"Lucas," Peyton smiled as she placed her hand on top of his. "I'm going to just have to hope for the best. When the time is right I will tell everyone else about my condition. For now I just want to live my life. When my times comes, whether it is fifty years down the road or a few months down the road, I will leave this world knowing that I had a good life and I had the best friends that I could have ever asked for. I want to leave this world on a good note, knowing that I righted my wrongs. That is why it is so important that I reconcile with Brooke. I can't fight this without her because she is such a big part of my life."

"Well then why don't you tell her that?"

"I will when the time is right. For now I want to focus on Brooke's recovery and make sure that I can get back at least a piece of our broken friendship. That is my one wish in this world. I can't leave this world without knowing that I left without Brooke as my best friend again."

"Okay, your secret is safe with me Peyton. I won't tell anyone until you are ready to let your secret out. God, Peyton this is so scary. I can't lose any of my friends right now. I've already lost so many people that I love." Lucas then wrapped his arms around Peyton. "It's okay to cry you know? You don't have to be strong all the time."

* * *

_**AN: I'm sorry if anyone didn't like the Leyton scene but they will only be friends in this story because I HATE Leyton as a couple. I do love their friendship though and I think that it will be important in my story. Also, I will be putting a poll up on my page. I'm not sure whether I want Peyton to die or overcome cancer just yet. I will let you guys vote for that on my poll. Hurry up and get your votes in while you can! I will also be putting up another poll for you guys to vote whether or not Brooke and Victoria reconcile in the end of the story. That is also up to you guys. Song used is What Are You Looking For by the Sick Puppies. Please review and let me know what you guys thought of this chapter!**_


	7. AN

I'm so so sorry that I haven't updated this story in forever. My computer was being a bitch so I took it in to get fixed but it started acting up again. I had more than 75 % of the next chapter written before I went to Italy over spring break but when I got back my computer wouldn't even turn on. So I'm not sure whether to start the chapter over or wait until I can get my computer running again, which could take a while. Unfortunately, I won't have my story outline or the next chapter so I'm going to wait it out and see. I may end up starting the chapter over but I really liked what I had written so I don't want to do so unless I absolutely have to. So please bear with me and I promise that once I have my computer back that I will work extra hard to update often.

-Megan


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